Noticed by You
by NewDawn13
Summary: Hikaru and Haruhi are dating. Hikaru is ignoring Kaoru and Kaoru is feeling depressed. He needs his brother back! Ecspecially with the feelings he has; the ones he always had but never noticed until now. Everyone notices Kaoru getting sick except the one person Kaoru wants to. Summary sucks, better than sounds! HikaKao twincest! Better summary inside!
1. Chapter 1

**Hello everyone! I have decided to write a Hikaru/Kaoru fanfiction (I apolagize to all my Wincest fans! But I noticed that poll is a little biased considering I _only_ have Wincest fans right now ^.^) Anyways, after reading millions of amazing Hika/Kao fics, I decided to write one of my own! It will be very angsty (just how I like them mwahaha!) but so far, I actually love it! And I hope you all feel the same! Right now I'm going to make a promise to FINISH this story because I read an AMAZING fanfiction that was never finished and I don't want that to happen to any fans of this story (If there are fans O.o) This is my first Ouran High School Host Club so don't be too harsh! **

**Better Summary:**

**Hikaru and Haruhi have started dating. Now that they are, all of Hikaru's attention is on his girlfriend and Kaoru has been left in the dust. Kaoru misses his brother. He loves his brother so much, but his twin has forgotten about him. Now Kaoru will try anything to get his brother's attention, even if he is absentmindedly making himself sick! But it seems as if everyone _except_ the one person he wants to notice is noticing! Even that stupid commoner, Haruhi Fujioka! He just wants his Hikaru back...**

**(Narrated by Kaoru)**

* * *

Hikaru and Haruhi?

Haruhi and Hikaru?

Whatever happened to Kaoru and Hikaru?

Hikaru and Kaoru?

I sigh and glance at the couch where Haruhi and Hikaru are sitting, their hands intertwined and laughing at something; probably some joke Hikaru made.

He is extremely funny like that.

Music Room #3 is empty save for us members of the host club. It's almost time for our first session with our guests, but to be completely honest, I'm not really in the mood to do our "Brotherly Love" act.

Why should I be?

Hikaru has been all over Haruhi ever since they started dating a week ago. I think he's completely forgotten about me.

He never talks to me anymore. Well, I guess that's a lie. He does talk to me; a lot actually.

But it's always, "Haruhi this" and "Haruhi that". I'm sick and tired of hearing about that stupid commoner. Who is she to be so important in Hikaru's life?

I sigh once more and continue with my thoughts about what to call the two of them: Hikaru and Haruhi, or Haruhi and Hikaru. I just can't decide.

I look out the window that is by the corner I am sitting in. I must admit that I am sulking as badly as Tono does. I'm actually surprised that I'm not growing mushrooms right now.

I remember when Hikaru and Haruhi announced that they were dating to the club.

Tamaki went in a corner and grew mushrooms for a whole two days. His daughter dating his son? That just wasn't acceptable! Especially when he was so madly in love with Haruhi. Though _he_ didn't quite realize that yet.

And me? I just stared. I went numb; numb in my body and numb in my mind. Everything swirled together, and I vaguely remember voices swimming around in the air; congratulations to the new couple.

But do you think Hikaru noticed?

Yes? Well, you're wrong because he didn't.

I waited. I waited for so long for him to read me. Read me like he always had before.

"He'll know what you are feeling, Kaoru," I remember thinking to myself the first few days after the announcement; "He'll know how sad you are and fix everything."

But a week later, he hadn't noticed at all. And me? I had given up.

"Kao-chan!" I turn from the window and see Honey standing in front of me, Mori standing to his side and Usa-chan hanging from his arms.

"Kao-chan, why don't you come have some cake with us?" he asks sweetly with a grin on his face.

"Yeah." Mori adds.

I smile at Honey. It's a pathetic smile, though. I know it is. I can't smile without Hikaru.

"Thanks, Honey, but I'm not really hungry." I say to him.

His face falls as soon as I speak. I try to look him in the eyes, but I find it too hard to look in such innocent, sad eyes, so I look at the ground instead.

"But you haven't eaten anything in _days_, Kao-chan!" Honey whines, "Takashi!" he says, dropping Usa-chan and pounding his little fists on his cousin's legs, "Tell Kao-chan to eat something! Tell him!" he orders, his eyes filling with tears.

I know I shouldn't, but while Honey is crying and yelling, and Mori is comforting him, I steal a glance at Hikaru to see if he notices the scene that has unfolded; the scene that is centered around me.

But there he is: his hands are still holding Haruhi's and he is staring into her eyes as she is talking, not even looking at me once.

Didn't he hear Honey? Does he not care that Honey has noticed that I'm not eating? Why can't he notice I'm not eating?

He's my twin brother! He should notice before anyone else! Everyone else!

I force myself to look away.

Tono walks over to the three of us and kneels down beside me, "What is this I hear, mon amour? You aren't eating?" he puts the back of his hand on my forehead, "Are you sick, Kaoru?!" he screeches.

I lift my hand and gently take Tono's off of my forehead, "No, Tono, I'm fine." I lie to him with another one of my weak smiles. Pathetic.

Tono jumps up dramatically and runs at an unbelievable speed up to Kyouya, who is standing unfazed with a notebook and calculator in hand.

"Mommy!" he cries, falling to his knees and looking up to Kyouya, or, according to him, Mommy. "Mommy, my son is lying to me! Why won't he let Daddy take care of him!" he wails.

Kyouya pushes up his glasses, "Well, _Daddy_, maybe Kaoru just needs to take a day off." He says in a monotone voice, obviously not too concerned.

Tono looks up with wide eyes, "A day off?" he repeats.

Kyouya nods, "Yes, go home and take a day off; get some rest."

"Go home." Tono repeats the words like a child learning a new phrase.

He quickly jumps up and flips his hair, a little over dramatically, if I do say so myself. He puts one hand on his hip and points an accusing finger at me.

"Kaoru!" I jump nervously, "You are going home this minute to get some rest!" he declares.

Honey starts clapping excitedly, "Yayyyyy Tama-chan!" he cheers approvingly whilst jumping up and down, Usa-chan back in his arms.

I stand up from my spot on the ground, "I'm fine, Tono!" I say defensively. "Really, I am. I don't need to take a day off." I fold my arms to show that I'm serious.

But at that moment, I feel extremely dizzy and I feel my knees go out.

I fall to the ground.

I hear a mixture of, "Kao-chan!" from Honey, "My son!" from Tono, and "Kaoru!" from…Hikaru?

I open my eyes to see three people kneeling beside me: Honey, Tono, and Haruhi.

Ah. It was Haruhi, not Hikaru, who said my name. Figures.

"Kaoru, are you okay?" I hear Haruhi say in that annoying voice of hers.

I rub the back of my head and prop myself up on my elbows, "Yeah," I say to her, the words feeling sour on my lips, "I'm fine."

I stand up but feel myself falling once again. I feel arms catch me and look up expectantly to see Hikaru.

But, alas, it is Mori.

I groan, my head pounding, and close my eyes. The people who were previously kneeling beside me get up and surround me.

"Where-where's Hikaru?" I ask desperately. Why isn't he in the group of people that are concerned about me? Hell, even Kyouya is standing close by with a look of what could be worry on his face!

I hear Haruhi talk once again. Ugghh.

"He went to the bathroom before you fell, Kaoru." She answers.

I groan once again.

I shouldn't be whining though. It's my fault I fainted.

If I had just eaten something the past few days.

Honey was wrong when he said I hadn't eaten _anything_ though. Crackers and water are quite delectable.

"But," I think as I feel my knees go wobbly, "possibly not enough."

"That's it, mon fils, you are going home this instant and I, your father, am going to take you!"

I feel hands taking me from Mori and open my eyes. Tono is now the one with his arms around me, holding me up.

I'm grateful, but why can't it be Hikaru?

"I guess I could take a day off." I whisper.

"That you could," Kyouya talks for the first time since I fell, "Although I think it would be a good profit for you to be sick and falling into your brother's arms every few minutes," he punches some numbers into his calculator, "We would end up losing more money if you didn't get well soon and had to end up leaving for a long period of time." He stops punching numbers in and pushes up his glasses.

I smile sheepishly. I know that's the Dark Prince's way of telling me to feel better.

"Thanks, Kyouya." I say to him. In response, he nods his head and walks away.

My legs are feeling less wobbly now so I tell Tono to let me go. He thinks for a moment before reluctantly obliging.

"You don't have to take me home, Boss." I say to him, "But could you call someone to take me home?" I ask.

He smiles, "Of course. I'll do it right now; they should be here in a few minutes." He whips out his cell phone and dials a number then lifts it up to his ear.

I turn towards the door and begin walking to it.

I hear footsteps behind me and am soon joined by Haruhi. Fantastic.

"Hikaru will want to know what happened, Kaoru." She says to me.

I shrug, "No he won't." I say plainly.

"Yes he will, you know that. I think you should tell him before you go."

"He's gone right now, Haruhi-" bleh, that name, "-Why don't you just tell him for me, no?"

She nods her head, "Alright, feel better, Kaoru." She falls back and I walk alone again.

I reach for the door handle, but before I even touch it, it swings open.

I am now face to face with my mirror image.

"Kaoru!" he says, shock evident on his voice, "Where are you going?"

"Home, Hikaru, I'm sick." I try to speak as little words as possible. I can already feel myself choking up because I know that he will not care.

"Sick? Should I go home with you?" he asks. He tries to sound sincere, but I can tell he is longing to stay here; with Haruhi.

I know this because I can still read him.

"Nai, you stay here." I say sadly.

I see a twinkle of relief in his eyes. He pulls me in for a hug-it feels so nice to be in his arms- "Alright, Kaoru! You feel better though, okay?" he pulls away, "I'll be home right after school to take care of you!"

He's lying.

I smile, "Sounds good." I say feigning enthusiasm.

He pats me on the back then walks away to join Haruhi.

I walk out of the room sadly and go outside.

A limo is waiting for me already. Tono wasn't kidding about the speed!

I get in the car and tell the limo driver to take me to the Hitachiin Mansion, and then look longingly out the window at the doors to Ouran.

I keep expecting Hikaru to run out of them and join me in the limo. That's what he would have done before he started dating Haruhi. He would have known I wanted him to come with me; he would have known I didn't want him to be giving all of his attention to that commoner.

But as the limo drove away, the doors did not swing open and my twin did not come racing out.

That is because Hikaru can't read me anymore. I can read him, but he cannot read me.

* * *

**To be continued.**

***Nervous breath* soooo how was it? Did you guys like it? I hope you did! Please leave a review if you're totally in love with it, you think it's so-so, or you just plain old want to shout at Hikaru for being so dumb! Anyways, the next chapter will be up as soon as possible (maybe not as soon as I like since school is starting up *shudders*) Hope you enjoyed :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi everyone! Wow, thanks for the reviews :) I'd like to give a special thanks to _EvilAngel07 _for being my first reviewer! Thanks so much :)**

**I'd also like to thank _HappyBlushCalayapie, fontorathelia, Asdf, Itch-chan, ANOTHER FANGIRL, Freeknes, _and_ pysychologicalwarefarelikeab oss._**

**__And also to, _fantorathelia, _who said she might see somthing tangible between Tamaki and Kaoru...culd she possibly be right? Amwa-amwhahahaha-MWHAHAHAHA! *starts coughing uncontrollably* *couhgs awkwardly* ehehm, anyways, enjoy :)**

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The clock tells me that it is two hours past when school ended.

Two hours and Hikaru still isn't home yet. I knew he was lying when he said he would be right home to take care of me; but still, I had hoped…

My stomach growls.

Wonderful. I'm hungry. I guess I could eat _something_. It wouldn't hurt.

I jump up from my bed and exit my room-yes, that's right: _my_ room! For the first time in our lives, Hikaru and I have separate rooms.

He came to me one day with an excited look on his face and told me that he was moving into the room right next to ours. He said he wanted to have more freedom-he wanted _both_ of us to have more freedom; to discover ourselves as separate people.

Sure, I smiled and agreed, but inside I was crushed. No more cuddling with Hikaru? No more late-night prank planning?

But he did not notice the sadness in my eyes as I helped him move his stuff in to his new room.

I walk down the stairs that lead to the kitchen and head to the pantry. Hmm. So there are no more crackers left? Well that's depressing.

I close the pantry and head back to the stairs-already given up on that whole eating idea-when I see something that catches my eye.

Sitting on the counter is a big, yellow, bundle of fantastic looking bananas.

My mouth begins to water and I walk in a hypnotized state over to the bundle.

I reach and take one and marvel at it as I walk upstairs and back into my room. I know I'm acting insane, but it has been too long since I last had a banana. They _are_ my favorite food.

I close my door and take a seat on my bed, and then peel the banana. I look at it once more before taking a small bite.

It tastes so good.

I fall back on my bed and continue taking small bites of this yellow delicacy; savoring every bite.

Then I hear a door downstairs open and close. I hear shoes walking and rummaging through things. Then I hear footsteps coming up the stairs.

My heartbeat starts to quicken. I wonder if he will come in my room.

The footsteps stop. There is silence and then my door swings open.

I sit up and see Hikaru standing at the door with a half-eaten banana in hand.

He smiles at me and lifts his banana up to indicate we are both eating them.

Thanks, Hikaru, because I didn't know that already.

"Kaoru!" he says excitedly, runs up to my bed, and jumps on it. "Kaoru, I've just had the best time! After school, Haruhi and I went down to one of those commoner shopping centers! She showed me everything! It was so crowded, Kaoru, there were so many commoners shopping around at the tiny little shops! They had everything there, Kaoru, everything! And the food was actually _good!"_ he shouts and throws his hands up.

I sigh, "That's great, Hikaru. I'm glad you had a good time." I fall back on the bed and throw the banana to the side. I'm not hungry anymore.

Hikaru smiles at me, happy that I am glad for him.

"You would have loved it, Kaoru! I wish you had come!"

I shrug as best as I can lying down, "Well, you know." I say.

Here it comes. He's going to remember that I'm sick and ask me if I feel better. He'll bring me some food then cuddle in bed with me and play with my hair as I fall asleep in his arms.

I just know he will.

A line forms on Hikaru's forehead as he scrunches his eyebrows together, "Know what, Kaoru?" he asks. He's not joking, either. He's being sincere. I was wrong.

"Sick." I say simply, my voice cracking as I talk. I can feel hot tears begin to form in the corners of my eyes.

"Oh, Kaoru! I'm so sorry I forgot!" Hikaru flops down on his belly and puts a hand to the back of my forehead, mimicking what Tono did earlier, "Are you feeling better?" he asks. Is that worry in his voice? I shouldn't get my hopes up.

I turn my head away from him and shut my eyes tight, "Yes, Hikaru, I am feeling much better, thank you." I lie to him.

I truthfully feel worse. When I got home, I tried to fall asleep, but I kept tossing and turning in my bed, thinking about what exactly Hikaru and Haruhi were doing while I was gone.

I didn't eat anything either. I just had a glass of water. In fact, the first thing I had eaten all day was that banana. And I wasn't going to finish _that._ Bananas aren't all that good anyways, now that I think about it.

Hikaru pats my head and jumps up. He gets off my bed and walks to my door, taking a bite of his banana.

"That's great!" he says with a full mouth. "I'm glad you said that, because I was thinking that maybe you could come with Haruhi and me on our next date this weekend!" his voice is full of eagerness.

I groan, "Hikaruuu! I don't want to ruin your date! I'll have no one to talk to!" I complain.

"That's not true! You'll have me and Haruhi!" he fights back.

"No, I won't, Hikaru, because you will be too busy talking to her and she will be too busy talking to you! I will just be a third wheel and you know it." Wow. Was that jealousy? I guess that's what you could call it.

Hikaru is obviously taken aback, "What are you talking about, Kaoru? Are you sure you're feeling better because you are speaking nonsense! I could never ignore you!" he shouts.

I laugh inwardly at the irony of what he just said.

"Fine, Hikaru," I say to him, "I'll go with you."

I agree for two reasons. One: I know how upset it will make him if I don't go, and two: I want to see if he notices how much he will indeed ignore me.

He smiles gleefully, "Great! I'll call Haruhi right now and tell her you're coming; she'll be so pleased to know!" he runs out of my room and slams my door.

Haruhi? He's going to talk to her?

He just spent all day with her and now he's going to call her?

He didn't spend any time with me today, yet he stops talking to me after he's done telling me about Haruhi?

How can someone who's only been in his life for less than a year matter more than me? His own brother. His twin. His other half. The person who's spent their entire life with him.

I groan and put my hands over my face.

XX

"Kaoru! You're back!" Tono runs to me as soon as Hikaru and I enter Music Room #3. As expected, Hikaru goes off to join Haruhi where she's standing.

He gives me a giant hug.

I burst out laughing; something I haven't done since Hikaru started falling for Haruhi.

"Yes, Tono, I'm back!" I say through chuckles and allow him to squeeze me tighter.

Hmm. That's strange. His tight hugs have never hurt this bad before.

Tono releases me and puts his hands on my shoulders. His eyes are twinkling and he has a huge grin on his face, "I was so worried about you! I was going to come visit you yesterday, but Hikaru told me not to bother! He told me you were fine!"

I feel anger build up inside me. Hikaru told him I was fine? How would he know! Did he say that just so he could run off with his new girlfriend?

"Did he now?" I say through gritted teeth.

Tono's face falls as he notices he's said something wrong.

"I'm sorry, Kaoru, I didn't mean to upset you." He apologizes.

I take a few deep breaths, "Nai, Tono, it is not you who has upset me."

Tono frowns, "Kaoru, are you okay? You've seen a little…depressed lately."

Depressed? I'm not depressed! If I were depressed, I would never smile and I would have cuts on my wrists! That's what depressed is, not being a little sad that your twin brother is ignoring you.

"Don't be silly, Tono, I'm not depressed. Just still a little sick, that's all." I say to him, hoping it will lift his spirits and reassure him.

It doesn't because he still gives me a concerned look; like he doesn't believe me.

"I don't know. Ever since Hik-"I stop him mid-sentence.

"Hey, Tono, how would you like to come with me, Hikaru and Haruhi on their date this weekend?" I offer. There is no way that I'm letting him figure out its Haruhi and Hikaru's dating that has made me sad before Hikaru does. No way.

Tono's face immediately brightens up. "I'd love to! Oh this is going to be so much fun! You, me, Hikaru, and Haruhi! I must go tell Kyouya of our plans! He'll be so happy for you." He shouts.

Kyouya will be happy for me? Why's that?

Before I can ask Tono what would make Kyouya happy for me, he's running off towards the older male and trying desperately to get his attention, waving his arms in front of Kyouya's face and shouting, "_Kyouya! Why won't you listen to me?!"_

Okay then. It's probably just Tono being overdramatic, like always.

I walk over to Hikaru and Haruhi who are standing in the middle of the room.

As they are in deep conversation, I stare at them, waiting for one of them to acknowledge my presence.

After what I think is a little too long of being ignored, I cough loudly into my hand.

Hikaru and Haruhi immediately stop talking and both look at me.

"What is it, Kaoru? I'm a little busy right now." He says and glances at Haruhi. Haruhi giggles in response.

I frown and rub the back of my head awkwardly, "I just thought I would let you know that I invited Tono to come with us on your date." I tell him.

His face turns a deep red and I can tell he's angry.

"Kaoru!" he shouts and I take a wary step backwards, "You can't do that! You can't invite other people to our dates, that's not polite!" he shouts.

I take a deep breath and look at the floor, "Well, Hikaru, I just thought that I could use a little company considering you two will want to spend time with each other." I whisper.

"You'll have _us_ to keep you company, Kaoru! Why do you keep thinking that I will ignore you? When have I ever ignored you?" he barks.

I smirk a little at that, "Well, I just wanted him to come, I guess."

Hikaru lifts a hand and I'm afraid he's going to hit me so I flinch.

When I flinch, he gives me a strange look and lowers his hand. A sober look comes on his face, "There-there was a fly Kaoru." He says in a hushed voice to me. "Why would you flinch? I would never hurt you." He says obviously confused.

I turn around, "Forgive me, Hikaru. I didn't mean to flinch." I apologize. Great. Now I've gone and upset him.

Hikaru sighs from behind me, "Okay, Kaoru, Tono can come. I overreacted."

I nod and walk away. I go straight to my corner and take a seat on the ground. I look over and see Honey, Mori, Kyouya, and Tono all looking at me with worried looks on their faces; yes, even Kyouya and Mori.

Why would that be? Nothing's wrong with me.

I sigh wearily and look out of the window at the sky outside. It's very pretty; a dark shade of blue with gray clouds.

At that moment, a thunder clap sounds and lighting soon follows.

I smile. Hikaru and I love thunderstorms.

I look over at Hikaru to see if he is enjoying the thunderstorm as much as I am.

Haruhi is talking to him, but his eyes are focused out of the window. He's looking in awe at the storm going on outside.

I knew he still loved these storms.

Then I frown as a thought crosses my mind.

He will take time away from Haruhi to admire a thunderstorm, but he won't for his own twin.

I look back outside the window and wipe a tear off of my cheek. I didn't even notice I was crying.

I wonder if anyone else noticed; I wonder if Hikaru did.

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**To be continued.**

**How was chapter two? Okay? Leave a review and tell me what you think! Reviews encourage me to write more and faster :) Thanks again!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello everyone :) Wow just...wow, thanks for all the wonderful reviews! You guys are so nice :D I'm sorry it took so long to update this, I was at Chicago Comic Con (yes, I know I'm a dork but it was SPECTACULAR!) all weekend with no internet besides the phone...which I can't update on :( **

**Anyways, as a side not, I was supposed to see Vic Monogna (the voice of our lovely Tamaki) but he canceled *sob* but I did get to see the Boondock Saints (anyone who knows them, you are awesome!) and Tom Felton! Quite an eventful weekend. Be glad I wrote this chapter before I was mad at Vic/Tamaki (not really mad...maybe a little)! I'll tell you why:**

**This chapter is centered around the growth of Kaoru and Tamaki's growing relationship.**

**So like I said, be glad I wrote it before I was mad...hehe Enjoy! :D**

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I prop my elbows up on the kitchen table and put my chin in my hands.

What is taking Hikaru so long?

It's the weekend and Haruhi and Tono are about to meet us at our mansion so we can all leave for Haruhi and Hikaru's picnic date. Hikaru was supposed to have joined me so we could be ready to leave as soon as they arrived, but he still hadn't come out of the bathroom.

"Hikaru, what's taking so long?" I whine.

I hear the door to the bathroom open and out comes Hikaru.

I gasp and my elbows slip. I almost hit my chin on the table, but luckily don't.

Hikaru is standing there with dark black jeans and a plain white button up shirt.

I don't know what it is about the outfit he's wearing, but it is extremely sexy.

He tucks the shirt in and looks at me, "Sooo," he says nervously, "How do I look?"

I gulp and shake my head to clear it, "Oh, Hikaru." I giggle.

I stand up from the table and walk over to him. I stick my hands underneath his waistband and start tugging on his shirt, "I would think with our mother, you would know that tucking your shirt in like this will make you look like a complete dork. Besides, it will wrinkle." I smirk.

Hikaru looks down at where my hands are, "Uhhh," he says. His cheeks turn a pink color.

I quickly pull my hands out, "Sorry." I say, my cheeks turning the same shade of pink as his.

Hikaru shakes his head and chuckles, "No problem. Now let's go outside; I think I just heard a car pull up."

Hikaru and I go to the front door and walk outside. Getting out of a limo are Haruhi and Tono.

Haruhi is wearing a strapless, bright yellow sundress with a pink flower by her right shoulder.

I must admit, she looks pretty.

Hikaru must think so, too.

"Wow." He whispers from beside me, then smiles and runs up to Haruhi and pulls her into a hug.

Tono walks up to me. He wears a white V-neck with a black shirt underneath. He has on the same color jeans as my brother, and I have to say, he looks equally as good.

"Good morning, mon amour, how are you today?" he asks brightly.

I smile back. I think it actually might be less weak than previous smiles I have been throwing out. "I'm doing good, Tono." I answer. Lying of course. How could I be good when my brother is going on a date with Haruhi and I am forced to watch?

Tono closes his eyes and shakes his head. He waves a hand in front of his face, "No, no, Kaoru; we aren't in the club, you can just call me Tamaki." He requests.

"Alright, Tamaki, so are you ready to go?" I ask. His name feels nice on my tongue.

He nods and turns around. We join Haruhi and Hikaru who are holding hands and blushing madly. Did they just…kiss?

"So what car are we taking, Hikaru?" I ask, trying hard not to think about them locking lips, and look around for one of the limos.

Hikaru laughs and pulls Haruhi in close, "We aren't taking a car, Kaoru! We're walking to the park instead."

Haruhi gasps and gives Hikaru a side-hug. "Oh, Hikaru! You remembered."

Her voice sends tingles up my spine; not the good kind either.

We walk down a sidewalk, Hikaru and Haruhi in front and their hand's intertwined. Tamaki and I walk behind them.

We walk in silence for a while until Tamaki grabs my hand and pulls me back.

"Hey!" I say, looking back to Hikaru to tell him to wait a second. But he didn't even notice that I was gone.

I look longingly at them as they leave, "What do you want, Tamaki?" I say in a weak voice.

Tamaki sighs and puts a hand on my shoulder, then puts his other hand under my chin and guides it to where I'm looking into his eyes.

"Kaoru, there's something wrong with you, I can tell. Please tell me." He begs. His eyes are full of sincere concern.

I laugh, "Nothing's wrong with me, Tamaki, I probably just haven't got over that cold yet, that's all."

Tamaki sighs wearily, "Don't lie to me, Kaoru. Everyone has noticed you're acting differently lately."

I feel my heart swell up and look away so Tamaki doesn't see the tears that I know will be falling out of my eyes any minute now, "Not everyone." I whisper so that he can't hear.

But I guess I didn't whisper quietly enough, because Tamaki says, "What was that? Not everyone? Ah." He says knowingly, "I thought Hikaru might have something to do with your behavior."

I turn to face him, "This has _nothing _to do with my brother!" I yell at him. Why am I lying? He's just trying to help me and I could use some help right now. Although I hate to admit that.

Tamaki nods, "Alright, Kaoru, you don't have to talk about it right now. But just know that everyone at the host club would love for you to open up to them; especially me." He smiles, "Daddy hates seeing you sad."

I smile and bring a hand to my eyes. I wipe away some tears with the back of my hand and Tamaki pretends not to notice.

Tamaki lets go of my shoulders, "We should probably hurry up and join those two before they worry about us." He announces.

Ha. They probably haven't even noticed we're gone.

We start running to the park and find Hikaru and Haruhi sitting on a blanket and opening a basket.

We slow down when we reach the edge of the blanket and take a seat next to each other.

"Kaoru, Tamaki, where were you two?" Haruhi asks.

My brain goes dead. What do I say?

I open my mouth to say something, but Tamaki intervenes.

"I'm sorry, you guys, I dropped something back there and Kaoru was nice enough to help me look for it; again, thank you, Kaoru." He looks at me and smiles; willing me to play along.

I wave my hand like it was no big deal, "No problem, Tamaki, what are friends for?" I say.

Wow. Tamaki is really good at thinking on his feet!

Hikaru claps his hands and reaches in the basket, "Alright, everyone, let's have some drinks." He pulls out an orange soda and hands it to me, "Here you go, Kaoru, your favorite."

Haruhi blushes and takes the drink out of my brother's hand, "Actually, Hikaru, that's _my_ favorite drink." She giggles.

Hikaru laughs, "Of course, Kaoru's favorite is…" he stops and thinks.

How can he not remember my favorite drink? We both know what each other's favorite _everything_ is! It's so obvious that his is Sprite and mine is-

"Cherry coke." Tamaki says. He's on his knees with one hand holding a can of cherry coke and the other propping him up. He backs up and plops down on his butt, then hands me the can.

Hikaru looks at Tamaki in awe.

"Cherry coke," Tamaki repeats, "That's Kaoru's favorite drink, am I correct?"

"Yes, that's right." I say, also in awe.

Tamaki smirks at Hikaru.

Hikaru shakes his head and gives me a smile, "I knew that, Kaoru. I was just playing with you."

Again, lying.

"So Haruhi," Hikaru says, starting to play with Haruhi's short hair, "What would my lovely lady like to do after we eat?"

Haruhi smiles. I look over at Tamaki and see that his face is turning a bright red and he is poking his two index fingers together.

He is clearly just as jealous as I am.

"I don't know, Hikaru. A walk around the lake seems pretty nice, though." She answers and leans into him.

"A walk after the lake it is, then." He says in agreement.

I can't believe the pair of them. I feel sick to my stomach-though that could also be because I haven't eaten in a few days-and want to throw-up. Not like I have anything to vomit anyways, though.

I feel a burning in my chest. Is this that jealousy again?

I can never decide who I am jealous of: Haruhi or Hikaru.

I do admit that when Haruhi told us apart, I was attracted to her. She had broken into our world and no one had ever done that before. I was also quite scared, actually.

So that could make me jealous of Hikaru.

But I could also be jealous of Haruhi.

Haruhi has all of his attention; all of his love. I want that. I want to be the one snuggling up to him right now as he plays lovingly with my hair.

Tamaki coughs awkwardly and brings me out of my thoughts.

"Who's hungry?" I ask, hoping that Hikaru will stop being all touchy-feely with Haruhi and help me unload the food.

I bend over to take food out of the basket when the can of soda I have in my hand slips and spills all over Tamaki's lap.

"Tamaki! I'm so sorry!" I yell and grab a napkin from the basket.

I start hopelessly patting at Tamaki's lap, not even noticing how close I am to his crotch area.

Tamaki lifts his hands and I see that there is a deep, scarlet blush on his face, "Uh, it's-it's no problem, Kao-Kaoru." He stutters.

"Kaoru! Stop that right now!" I hear Hikaru's voice yelling.

I immediately stop patting and jump.

"What, Hikaru? I was just getting the drink off of him!" I fight back. I'm so confused. Why is Hikaru upset? What did I do this time?

"Just don't, okay? It's not right!" he yells angrily.

I stare stupidly at him. "Not right?" I repeat, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Hikaru puffs out his chest, "I just don't think you two should be all touchy with each other, that's all. It isn't normal." He nods his head in conclusion.

Tamaki jumps up and points a finger at my brother, "Hikaru Hitachiin!" he yells and Hikaru jumps a little in surprise, "Daddy will not allow his sons to fight! You apologize to your brother this _instant!"_

"Tama-" Hikaru starts.

"_Now, Hikaru!" _Tamaki demands.

Hikaru rolls his eyes and looks at me, "Sorry, Kaoru, I shouldn't have yelled. It was immature of me." He says quietly. I know he doesn't mean it, but so that I don't upset "Daddy", I say, "It's alright, Hikaru."

Tamaki smiles in triumph and plops down back next to me.

What was up with that? I didn't do anything. Why was Hikaru being so immature and dumb?

"Uh, let's eat, guys, I'm starving!" Haruhi says, breaking the awkward silence.

XX

I'm staring, I know I am.

The four of us just got done with our walk around the lake, and are now sitting close by it.

Hikaru and Haruhi are near the edge of the lake, tossing stones into the water, while Tamaki and I sit a little ways back, both staring helplessly at the person we want to be with.

Like I had expected, Hikaru had overlooked me all day. He didn't even notice he was ignoring me! He just spent his good old time fawning over that stupid commoner.

I tried talking to him, but he blatantly ignored me.

I didn't eat anything, either. All the food that was packed looked disgusting to me. Even though it was some of my previously favorite foods, I just can't seem to down anything now a days. If I do, it comes right back up.

I must admit, I have lost a considerable amount of weight.

Hikaru hasn't noticed that either, though.

What will it take to get him to notice me again?

"They do seem perfect for each other, don't they?" Tamaki says absentmindedly from beside me.

"What?" I ask him.

I turn to look at him and he is looking at the laughing couple in front of us.

"Hikaru and Haruhi," he continues, "They seem like they were made for each other; soul mates." He says sadly.

I feel that anger swelling up inside me again. Not at Tamaki, but at what he said.

Hikaru and I are supposed to be soul mates! We have always been. Reading each other's thoughts and actions, knowing what the other was feeling, being together our entire lives! What else would that be called besides soul mates!

Surely someone he had just met couldn't take that position…could they?

I look down at the two of them. They are looking into each other's eyes, and then lean in for a kiss.

My heart aches as their lips touch. Tears well up in the sides of my eyes and begin free falling.

"I guess they are." I answer Tamaki finally.

We both sigh sadly in unison.

I sniff loudly and bring my legs up close to me. I wrap my arms around them and drop my head into them. Now I can cry without anyone seeing.

After a few seconds of sobbing into my arms, I feel an arm wrap around my shoulders and pull me in close.

At the feel of Tamaki's arm, I begin sobbing even louder. I am grateful that we are far enough away from Haruhi and Hikaru that they cannot hear me, but I also wish that they could hear me. That way Hikaru would worry.

Tamaki starts gently running his fingers through my hair and begins shushing me.

"I miss him so much, Tamaki!" I confess.

Tamaki squeezes me and brings me in closer, "I know, Kaoru, I know."

"I-I just want my brother b-back! He doesn't even no-notice me anymore! It's like I'm not even his twin anymore!" I wail out, choking on my own words.

Tamaki plants a soft kiss on the top of my head, "I notice you, Kaoru. You don't need to impress him; you don't need his attention. You have your friends and we all love you. We're worried about you, Kaoru, we just want you to feel better."

After the initial shock of the feel of Tamaki's lips on my head, I start crying again, "I know you guys care, and I love you all, too. But sometimes a person just needs their brother. Hikaru is my best friend, Tamaki! And now it's like I'm just a part of his past. A forgotten memory." I whimper.

"I can be your best friend, Kaoru. You can depend on me." He suggests.

How did he know that? How did he know I need someone to depend on? Am I so obviously submissive?

After a while of thinking, I glance up to see Hikaru and Haruhi stand up and share one last kiss. They begin walking towards us, Haruhi under Hikaru's arm.

I feel the jealousy again. The loneliness, the abandonment, the betrayal, the anger…

"Yes, Tamaki. I want you to be my best friend. I want to depend on you." I agree quietly.

I hear him let out a satisfied sigh, "I'm so glad, Kaoru." He says before we are joined by my brother and his date.

"Kaoru? Tamaki?" Hikaru says quietly, studying the two of us. "What are you doing with your arm around my brother?!" he asks. He's very selfish. His arm is around Haruhi right this second.

"We were just having a talk, mon fils inconscients, do not get the wrong idea." He says calmly and takes his arm off me.

He stands up and extends a hand toward me. I grab it and he lifts me up.

I sniff once more and wipe the tears and snot off of my face.

"Kaoru?" Hikaru says, releasing Haruhi and taking a step closer to me, "Were you crying?" he asks.

"No!" I say. My voice cracks. Well…that's convincing, isn't it?

"Yes you were!" Hikaru says, grabbing my arm and tugging me towards him, "Your eyes are all poofy and red!"

"You are wrong, Hikaru. It's just my allergies." I whisper to him, staring down at my shoes.

He squeezes my arm tightly, "Please let go, Hikaru, you're hurting me." I whisper.

He either doesn't hear, or doesn't listen.

"You're lying, Kaoru! You don't have allergies! You haven't had allergies since you were five!" he yells and squeezes tighter on my arm. It's so painful.

"Actually, Hikaru, last month my allergies came back. I take pills for it now; every morning and evening. I didn't take them this evening since we were here." I tell him. And it's the truth. He just didn't notice that my allergies had returned.

He squeezes even harder, "You're lying!" he yells.

I slam my eyes shut. His grasp hurts so bad, "Hika, please." I whisper.

"Hikaru!" I open my eyes and see Tamaki looking furiously at Hikaru, "You're hurting him! Can't you tell?"

Hikaru looks at me and sees the pain on my face. He looks down at my arm and notices he is squeezing, then slowly lets go.

He sniffs then grabs Haruhi's hand, "Let's go, Haruhi." He says.

He tugs at her hand and drags her away. She looks back once to give and apologetic look, before turning back to Hikaru.

Tamaki walks up to me and grabs my arm. Not in a painful way. Lovingly and soft, "Does your arm hurt? Did he hurt you?" he asks speedily. The worry is evident on his voice as he studies my arm.

"Nai, I am fine, Tamaki. But thank you." I say to him and gently pull my arm away. "We should probably get going, too." I say to him. "I'm feeling that dizziness again." I say.

My legs are starting to wobble and my head is clouding up.

I start falling, but Tamaki catches me with one arm and holds me up.

"Let's go, Kaoru, my house isn't too far from here; you can spend the night, if you'd like."

I nod and nuzzle into his arm, grasping tightly at his shirt. I close my eyes and let him guide me. I feel so sleepy. I feel sleepy, and I feel dizzy, and I feel lonely.

How is it that this person, this friend, can read me so much better than my own twin brother?

It just doesn't make any sense.

* * *

**So I really hope you guys liked this chapter :) Tell me what you thought about it, leave suggestions if you have any ideas in your head, and again, thankyou for the reviews and favorites! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello my lovelies! Just...wow! Thank you so much for all your support, what with reviews and favorites and subscribing and what not! That's so generous! **

**I apologize for the long wait! I met up with a old friend of mine named School and he introduced me to his friend BrainFart DX**

**Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and will be as AWESOME as you were with the last chapter (reviews rock!) **

**Sorry for all you non TamakixKaoru fans out there, but don't worry, they aren't the main couple! I just really needed him to get close with another character and I chose our lovely Tamaki! Anyways, I'll let you read now! OH, before I forget! **

**Tamaki _may_ go on a French rant somewhere in this chapter, so the translation of what he says is at the very end! (Hey, you! Don't look ahead!)**

* * *

I wake up in someone's arms.

Hikaru?

I close my eyes and sigh blissfully and snuggle in closer. The arms around me squeeze me tighter.

Hmm, I can't remember Hikaru coming into my room last night, but I guess it doesn't really matter.

I just like being in his arms again.

"Hikaru." I whisper into my brother's ear.

I hear a chuckle, "Kaoru, I think you are delirious."

My eyes shoot open. That isn't Hikaru's voice! And now that my eyes are open, that's not red hair, that's blonde.

"Tono?!" I screech, pushing back.

Tono yawns and props himself up on his elbows, and then looks at me.

"I thought I told you that you could call me Tamaki," Tamaki gives me a warm smile and stretches.

"Right-Tamaki…how did I get here?" I ask.

I don't remember getting to Tamaki's house last night. The last thing I remember was being held in Tamaki's arms as we walked. He asked me something…what did he ask me?

Tamaki gives me a sober look, "Well last night after you agreed to spend the night at my house-" oh, had that been his question? "-you fainted so I picked you up and carried you to my house. You weren't waking up so I put you in my bed-I hope you don't mind that we slept in the same bed. I watched you for a while until I suppose I fell asleep. I didn't even realize I had; I wanted to keep an eye on you…" Tamaki thinks and adds as almost an afterthought, "I was so worried, mon amour."

My cheeks grow hot and I know I am blushing.

We slept in the same bed? He was worried about me? He called me 'mon amour', my love?

But the real question is: why does this make my heart beat faster and my cheeks turn red? I've never felt anything for anyone before.

No one besides Hikaru, that is.

Tamaki smiles, "You're blushing, Kaoru, have I said something right?" he asks with a mixture of hopefulness and amusement.

This makes me blush even harder, "Ah, am I? I hadn't realized…" I whisper. There I go lying again. I'm just as bad as Hikaru sometimes.

Tamaki's smile broadens.

Oh no.

He's realized that I lied. I can tell by the look on his face.

It's the exact same one Hikaru gets when I lie to him, because he knows.

Well, I should say got. He doesn't get that look anymore.

"Kaoru, don't you li-Kaoru!" Tamaki screams and then I don't hear anything else.

Everything goes black.

What feels like a few seconds later, I open my eyes and see Tamaki above me.

"Ta-Tamaki?" I whisper.

My head is pounding.

"Kaoru! Oh thank God you're conscious again! You were out for so long!" he tugs me in so that my head is pressed up against his chest.

I just now realize that I am cradled in Tamaki's lap; like a baby.

"No I wasn't; I was only out for a few seconds, right?" I ask. I was, wasn't I?

Tamaki's face becomes very sober and he doesn't say anything. His eyes, which are usually bright and gleeful, are dull and sad.

"Whatever, it's no big deal." I say, blowing it off and pushing myself out of Tamaki's arms.

I stand up and brush myself off, my head spinning do to standing up so quickly.

Tamaki looks up at me, "Kaoru, it is a big deal! You've been fainting so much lately; there is definitely something wrong with you! You don't look well, mon amour! You are so pale and so skinny…" he whines.

I open my mouth to object, but look down and catch his eyes.

He looks so, so worried and my heart breaks inside.

At the same time, my brain starts swarming with questions and I feel incredibly confused.

Why the hell is he so worried? Why does he look so sad? How has he noticed all these things about me? I'm pale? I'm skinny enough for it to be noticeable? Why hasn't _Hikaru _noticed if it's so damn obvious? What can I do to _get_ him to notice?

"Please don't worry, Tamaki," I whisper reassuringly and extend my hand so I can help him up. "I'm fine, truthfully. Please will you just drop it?" I ask, my voice cracking as I practically beg for him not to mention my health again.

Tamaki takes my hand and I pull him up.

He steps up to me, a stern look on his face.

He towers a few inches above me and glares. I've never seen him like this before.

I cower back a bit.

He's not messing around…

"Kaoru! There is no way in _hell_ you can make me just drop this! How could I drop something so serious? Are you crazy?!" he shouts, but I can hear the legit concern that is in his voice and see as his face falters.

He puts a hand on my shoulder lovingly, "Let me help you, Kaoru, please. Just let me help once and then I will stop bothering you, okay?" he says more quietly.

His face is softer, but his eyes still have the grave look.

I look up at him.

How can I say no? He's so innocent; so sweet and he's just trying to help me.

No. I must reject his help.

How will Hikaru notice I'm not okay if I start getting better, right?

"No, Tamaki, really I can't." I say, looking down at my feet.

Tamaki bites the inside of his cheek and reluctantly nods his head with a sigh. "Fine, Kaoru. It's your decision and I should respect it." He chokes out. I can tell how much he doesn't want to say that.

I sigh with relief and relax my previously tense shoulders, "Thank you, Tamaki, really."

He looks away from me and nods.

I smile and look to the side.

That's when I see the clock sitting on the table next to Tamaki's bed.

Is it really one in the afternoon?!

"Tamaki!" I say speedily, turning back to face the older male, "I need to be getting home! Hikaru will worry!" I yell and run to the side of the bed to grab my shoes and put them on.

As I tie the knot on my left shoe, I glance up at Tamaki.

He's looking at me with a look of pity on his face, like I'm someone who's chasing a figment of their imagination; something that isn't really there.

I finish tying my shoe and become angry.

What? Does he think that Hikaru _won't_ be worried? Huh?

Does he think that I _know_ Hikaru won't worry and that I'm just lying to myself?

How could he possibly think those things? I _know _Hikaru is at home, pacing around and wondering where I'm at! He has to be! He's probably called my phone a million times, and I've been the irresponsible twin by not answering and putting his worries to ease!

I reach in my pocket and take my cell out.

I flip it open and see that I have no missed calls.

A tear falls out of my eye.

"Kaoru." Tamaki says quietly, and takes a step towards me.

Now how exactly did Tamaki know that I was lying to myself the whole time, and that I knew Hikaru wasn't worried?

I put my phone away and turn my head away from Tamaki, "Nai, Tamaki, can we just get going?" I say, silently begging him to just take me home without mentioning what he knew.

It's deadly silent before I feel Tamaki's hand grab mine.

I look up at his smiling face and give him a weak smile.

Why does he make me feel so happy? Feel better inside?

I allow him to pull me up and lead me out of his room.

We walk downstairs and out the large front doors of his home.

I see a black limo with tinted windows waiting for us in the driveway.

Tamaki walks us over to it, then lets go of my hand and opens the door for me.

I feel arms suddenly grab me and am forcefully pulled in.

"What the-Tamaki!" I yell as I am hit with realization.

Tamaki slides into the seat next to me and slams the door shut.

The familiar sound of clicking sounds as all the doors are locked. I feel a jerk as the driver steps on the gas.

"Let me go!" I yell, kicking and trying to squirm out of Mori's arms.

"Please calm down, Kao-chan, we just want to talk, kay?" I hear Honey's sweet voice say.

"Tamaki, you betrayed me you bastard!" I yell at Tamaki, trying hard to get my hands on him so I can strangle that stupid neck of his.

Tamaki gets a hurt look on his face, but holds his head high, "I'm sorry, Kaoru, I really am, but you need help. I called Kyouya while you were passed out. I told him you needed a doctor and that we might need back up. We all just want to help you, Kaoru." He finishes.

I squirm more, "_TAMA-_"

My words are cut short as Mori tightens his grip on me.

"Stop." He says plainly and sternly.

I immediately stop squirming.

I'm in no condition to be resisting against Mori. I wouldn't even be able to win if I were in perfect health.

As soon as I stop resisting and relax, Mori loosens his grip.

I now get a good look around.

The back of the limo is separated from the front by a black, soundproof, window.

Mori is sitting in the middle, me practically in his lap, and Honey is sitting to his left, hugging Usa-chan tightly, tears in the corners of his eyes.

And Tamaki? He's sitting to our right.

I'm glaring at him with such a look that his face falls and becomes pale with sadness.

He looks down at his lap in shame.

None of this fazes me; he deserves my glaring.

The window that separates us from the front opens and I am greeted by Kyouya's voice.

He pushes his glasses up, "Kaoru." He nods, "I can't say I'm happy to see you considering the condition; I wish we were meeting on happier terms, but we're not, so calm down. And will you please stop glaring at Tamaki like he's wronged you."

This gets my attention.

I stop glaring at Tamaki and look at Kyouya, my eyes wide in shock.

How can he say that? Of course Tamaki has wronged me! He lied to me! He said he would drop it, but he didn't!

Kyouya smirks, "Don't looks so shocked; Tamaki was doing what was in your best interests. It's frightfully obvious how sick you are and Tamaki here is trying to help you. No one likes seeing you this way, Kaoru, so get over yourself and just let us help." He says, his voice raising only slightly, breaking his usual emotionless exterior.

His words sink in immediately and I feel instantly guilty.

Tamaki was just trying to help me. I'm his friend and he hates seeing me in the condition I'm in.

If he were like I am, I guess I would do the same.

Even though I'm truly not that sick; I really don't know what they are going on about.

I look back to Tamaki, "Listen, Tamaki, I'm so sorry. I know you're just trying to help, but I just don't see the point; I'm not sick." I apologize.

Tamaki continues to look at his lap and nods. He still seems upset.

"Tamaki isn't the only one to blame, Kao-chan; all of us were a part of this because we want to make you feel better again!" Honey says sadly.

He waits for a moment before extending his hand to me. I see that Usa-chan is clenched in his fingers, "You can hold Usa-chan if you want. It's okay with me, and he wants to help you feel good, too!" He says cheerfully.

I'm touched by this, but I have to decline. No soft toy bunny is going to make me feel any better.

The only thing that will make me feel better is for my twin to just figure out that he needs me and not that stupid commoner.

"No thanks Honey. I'm fine." I decline, a fake smile on my face.

He opens his mouth to object, but the car jolts to a stop and Kyouya says, "We're here. Get out. Mori, you carry Kaoru in, we can't risk him making a break for it."

What the hell? I'm not going to run! Well, I wasn't planning on it…

"Hey!" I say as Mori brings me in his arms and scoots awkwardly out of the limo after Tamaki.

Tamaki slams the door and we make our way into Kyouya's mansion.

Kyouya leads in front and we walk until we reach a room in an empty part of his home.

He opens the door and gathers us all inside, then closes and locks the door.

Only then does Mori set me down.

There is a pretty woman standing by a chair with a clipboard in hand.

"Kaoru, this is Doctor Hiromi." Kyouya introduces the woman.

"Come take a seat, Kaoru." Dr. Hiromi says kindly.

I furrow my eyebrows and stay frozen.

I feel two hands push me and turn around to see Tamaki giving me a reassuring smile.

This helps me a little, but I still only just reluctantly walk to the chair and take a seat.

Dr. Hironi says nothing except for when she's asking me to do something.

The most she does is grunt or say "uh-uh" after making me do some sort of test.

After a long series of physical tests, she finally gives a satisfied grunt and looks to my four friends.

Tamaki is pacing in circles, Mori's standing silently by a chair that Honey is sitting in, playing with Usa-chan, and Kyouya is sitting with a blank expression on his face, staring intently at me.

"Well it's quite obvious what's wrong with him." She declares.

Tamaki stops pacing and Honey lowers Usa-chan.

"He's undernourished; he hasn't been getting the proteins he needs. Have you been eating?" she asks me.

I don't say anything.

It's silent until Tamaki says, "You know, now that I think about it, Kaoru didn't eat anything when we had our picnic yesterday…Kaouru, is that what's wrong with you? You haven't been eating _anything?_!" He screeches.

Honey starts crying and Kyouya pushes his glasses up with a grunt.

I cross my arms, both in anger and embarrassment, "Well crackers are something…" I mumble defensively.

Tamaki storms up to me, "_Kaoru!" _I flinch at the volume in his voice, "Comment pourriez-vous pas manger? Savez-vous comment je suis inquiet à votre sujet? Pas étonnant que tu es si maigre! C'est pourquoi vous êtes toujours évanouie! Tu es si bête! Oh, Kaoru, comment pourrais-je ne pas savoir! N'avez-vous pas confiance en moi? Vous auriez dû me dire tout de suite. Qu'est-ce qui pourrait être vous tracasse, mon amour? Il suffit de dire papa et il fera tout mieux. Oh, Kaoru! Kaoru, Kaoru, Kaoru! Laissez-moi vous aider…" he shouts in French before breaking down on the ground.

He grasps my knees and begins sobbing.

The whole room is silent in shock.

I lower my head and look down at Tamaki. He is hiccupping and sniffing, his sobs growing louder.

I had no idea how upset I had truly made him.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. The whole room hears, but they know it is meant for Tamaki.

I put a hand on Tamaki's head and stoke his hair, "I'm so sorry." I say once more.

At that moment, Kyouya's phone rings.

All but Tamaki look at him.

Kyouya reaches inside his pant's pocket and takes his cell out, then answers; "Hello?" he pauses. "Hikaru? Calm down." He says.

Hikaru?

I gasp and my heart beat quickens.

Tamaki's sobs stop and he looks back at Kyouya.

I listen to Kyouya talk to my brother, "Hikaru you need to calm down! I can't understand a word you are saying. Now please collect yourself and repeat." He orders.

There's a long pause before he says, "Yes, Kaoru is with me."

Oh no. Oh no.

Why is Kyouya walking towards me? Why is he handing his phone to me? Why am I taking the phone? Why am I putting it to my ear and squeaking out, "Hello?"

"_Kaoru!_ Where the fuck are you? Where did you go last night? Why are you with Kyouya? Why didn't you call me? I've been so worried about you, Kaoru! You can't just disappear without telling me anything!" Hikaru shouts, bombarding me with questions.

Wait a minute, he is worried?

Wait one more minute, _I'm _the one who disappeared?!

"Hikaru, if I do remember correctly, it was you who left me at the park." I fight back. Well, weakly fight back in truth.

There's a brief silence.

"Just get your ass back here right now, Kaoru! Me and Haruhi will be waiting for you!"

And then silence.

He hung up.

I close the phone and sit in a numb state.

I feel four pairs of eyes on me.

I clear my throat, "I have to go home." I say to them, staring at no one.

Tamaki collects himself and stands up, "We'll take you." He says.

I nod my head and stand up.

I'm going to need all the support I can, I suppose.

I'm quite scared about what'll be waiting at home.

Hikaru isn't pleasant when he's angry, and from how he sounded on the phone, he's furious.

But that isn't the worst part.

What was that he said before hanging up?

"'Me and _Haruhi_ will be waiting for you!'"?

Why can't it just be him?

* * *

**To be continued.**

**Translation:**

**"How could you not be eating? Do you know how worried I am about you? No wonder you are so skinny! That's why you're always fainting! You're being so dumb! Oh, Kaoru, how could I not have known! Don't you trust me? You should have told me right away. What is it that could be bothering you, my love? Just tell Daddy and he will make it all better. Oh, Kaoru! Kaoru, Kaoru, Kaoru! Just let me help you..."**

**So there's ^ Tamaki's rant in English! I just really wanted him to have a huge monologue of just French cause French is the best! So did you guys like this chapter? Tell me what you think! Have a good night, mes amours! :) (Btw, I really love the drama in the next chapter ;) )**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello all! I'd like to thank every single one of you who left an AWESOME review :D You guys are the best :') Anyways, I hope you guys like this chapter. It's...pretty dramatic and you just may hate Hikaru by the end of it. You'll probably even wonder if he will ever be able to redeem himself. And could their possibly be the tiniest of cliffhangers? Hell if I know! Read to see ;) **

**I love you guys!**

* * *

I stand in front of the door to my house. Tamaki, Kyouya, Honey, and Mori stand at my side.

"Be brave, Kao-chan!" Honey says reassuringly.

Tamaki nods in agreement.

I sigh and reach for the door handle.

I hesitate briefly before opening the door.

"Young Master, you're back!" one of the maids says to me as my posse and I enter the house.

"Your brother and a girl are waiting for you upstairs." She says.

I nod to her and turn around.

"Could you all…please come with me?" I ask in a meek voice while looking down at my shoes.

Tamaki cups my chin and pulls it up.

I am now staring in those gorgeous eyes of his.

"Of course we will, Kaoru." He whispers back.

The others nod in agreement.

I smile gratefully, turn back around, and begin my way up the stairs to where Hikaru will be waiting for me.

He's in his room, I bet. No, I know.

And he's with Haruhi.

He's waiting for me. Pacing around his room while Haruhi sits on his bed and tries to calm him down.

That is exactly what I'm going to see when I enter his room.

And I'm absolutely right.

As soon as I quietly and gingerly open the door to Hikaru's room, I see the lay out that I imagined in my mind.

Hikaru stops pacing and Haruhi bolts up from her seat on the side of his bed.

Hikaru marches straight up to me and grabs both my wrists.

"How could you, Kaoru?" he shouts in my face. "How could you worry me so much?" he yells.

I don't even realize that I start sobbing.

Has he finally realized that there is something wrong with me? Is he finally going to break up with Haruhi and give his time back to me?

"How was I supposed to know where you had gone last night? You didn't call me; you didn't text me, NOTHING! Where did you sleep, Kaoru, huh?"

Tamaki steps in, "He slept at my house, Hikaru." He says quietly.

He is speaking to my brother, but he is looking directly at me, his eyes filled with concern. I can see he wants to intervene and get Hikaru's hands off of me.

Hikaru glares at me with utter distaste, "You spent the night with that idiot?" he spits viciously, "I told you I didn't want you two to be acting all…whatever the hell you two are being like! It isn't normal, Kaoru!"

I hiccup and sob again.

Tamaki takes a step towards me and Mori inches closer to Hikaru in case my twin does something he will regret.

Would he regret?

"Why are you crying, Kaoru?" Hikaru says as he tightens his grip and pulls me in close.

Why is he being this mean if he truly cares?

Well I guess I know why.

Hikaru doesn't know how to display emotion correctly, so instead he just uses anger for every emotion he has. It's black and white for him: anger and happiness.

Hikaru pulls me in and hugs me, taking me and everyone else in the room by complete surprise.

"I'm the only one for you, Kaoru, you know that." He whispers in my ear, his breath sending shivers down my spine.

No one else in the room hears.

I put my head in his shoulder and sob.

How could he say that? How can he have someone other than me and still say that he's the only one I can have? Is he so dumb that he can't see I'm the only one for him, too?

"I think you guys should leave." Hikaru says to the stunned group of boys who stand behind us.

He puts his lips on my head and kisses the top of it.

"Kaoru?" Tamaki asks.

"Just go." I agree.

After a few moments, I hear footsteps and it is soon only Hikaru, Haruhi, and I in the room.

It's funny, but usually when Hikaru sends everyone home from our house; it is only the two of us left.

Now there is a third party.

Hikaru releases me from the hug and looks at me like a weary father who is sick of his misbehaving son.

It's the look of someone who has finally given up.

"Kaoru," he says tiredly, "I have no idea what's been up with you lately and why you are hanging out with Tono so much. If that idiot has something I don't and he can make you feel better, than I guess you really should go to him instead of me."

I want to slap Hikaru so bad right now.

How can he be such an IDIOT?! He's totally missed the point!

It _isn't _Tamaki that makes me happy, it's _him!_

How can he not see that?

Sure, Tamaki is an amazing friend and great support! But Hikaru is the one that I want to be running to! He just won't let me! He's so infuriating!

"Whatever makes you happy, Kaoru." He says sadly as he looks down at the ground.

Haruhi comes up behind him and puts a loving hand on his shoulder.

He grabs it with his hand and turns to look at her, a sparkle in his eye and a small smile.

I throw my arms up in defeat, "You're so dumb, Hikaru!"

Hikaru looks at me in shock, "_What?!"_

"You heard me! You're an idiot, Hikaru!" I shouldn't be saying these things, I'm going to regret them later, and I'm letting my emotions get to me. Oh no, why can't I stop. "Why can't you just understand? You make me so mad, Hikaru, sometimes…sometimes I just _hate_ you!" I scream, and then clamp my hand over my mouth.

I knew it. I knew I was going to say something I didn't mean.

And now it was out there in the open. Just hanging there.

I want so badly to grab it and stuff it back in my mouth. But I know I can't.

I can't take it back.

I can never take it back.

Hikaru clenches his jaw.

I turn around and speed out of his room into mine.

I slam the door behind me and lock it, then run to my bed and fall on it.

I grasp my hair in frustration and groan.

How could I have said something so evil to my twin brother?

I don't hate him, I love him!

He's the best thing that has ever happened to me! He's everything to me and I just told him I hate him!

Oh, God, what do I do?

Will he ever forgive me for this?

I close my eyes and imagine one of the many acts Hikaru and I did in the club.

I see him with his arms around me, hugging me close with his lips pressed against my forehead.

I miss that so much.

He loved me then.

Now he doesn't.

Now he thinks I don't either.

I need to go apologize. I need to make everything right and the only way I can do that is if I apologize right now.

I jump up from my bed and run to my door.

I run straight out of my room to Hikaru's room.

His door is closed shut, so I take a deep breath and crack it open.

"Hika-"I stop and close the door quickly.

My eyes fill up with tears and I fall to the ground.

When I opened the door, I saw Hikaru sitting on the edge of his bed with his head thrown back.

Haruhi was on her knees in-between his legs, sucking away at his…yeah.

Neither of them had noticed me come in. Neither of them knew what I had seen.

How could Hikaru do this to me? How could he do something like that with that slutty commoner?!

I've never hated someone so much in my life before, and she hadn't even really done anything to me.

In fact, all she's been doing is making my brother happy.

Really happy.

Really, really happy.

Maybe that's why she is doing what she is right now.

And maybe last night, Hikaru wasn't even worried about me, and he was really doing things with her.

Did she spend the night? She was here in the morning. Maybe she hadn't _come_ over today; maybe she had already _been _here.

I put my hands on my face and sob into them.

XX

We sit at opposite ends of the car. Both of us are in identical postures: one elbow propped on the side of the car, our hand supporting our chin, legs crossed, and looking angrily out the window.

We haven't said anything to each other since yesterday when I saw Haruhi giving my brother a blowjob.

I never got to apologize to Hikaru, and that's why he is still mad at me.

Oh well. Didn't seem like he really was thinking about me yesterday, anyways.

And me? I'm angry because of what they did yesterday. Hikaru betrayed me. He can't do something like that with her! With anyone!

We pull into Ouran and get out of the limo.

We stay at a good distance from each other and each walk to our first class.

Luckily, Hikaru and I only have one class together.

The bad thing is that we also share that class with Haruhi.

As they talk to each other in that class, I can't help but glare. I tap my pencil hotly on the desk, and I don't even realize that I break it when I see Hikaru whisper something in Haruhi's ear that makes her blush madly.

Finally, it is time to go to the host club.

I walk alone the Music Room #3.

I open the door and walk in slowly.

When I see Hikaru, already in the room, talking to Haruhi- _once again!-_ I cross my arms and squint my eyes at them.

Hikaru looks up and catches my eye.

He stares at me a while with a confused expression.

Maybe he's wondering why I'm staring at him so madly.

Or maybe he's wondering why I suddenly hate him.

I shift my eyes to the side and see Tamaki.

That's when an idea pops in my head.

I speed walk up to Tamaki and grab him by the arm.

He stops talking to Kyouya and looks at me.

"Kaoru!" he exclaims, "How ar-"

"Come with me." I say, cutting him off.

I begin dragging Tamaki out of the room. Two people are staring at us: Kyouya, who looks slightly confused as to why I suddenly kidnapped Tamaki from him, and Hikaru.

I look back in time to see Hikaru looking at Tamaki and me with a disapproving expression.

Perfect.

I open the doors and drag Tamaki out with me.

I ignore his protests and questions as to where we are going, and take him to an empty hallway near the music room.

I open a door to our right that leads to one of the janitor's closets and lock the door behind us.

"Kaoru, why are we in a dirty old janitor's closet?" he asks me breathlessly.

The closet is small so we are pushed up against each other; chest to chest.

"Will you answer me, Kaoru?" he asks once more.

"I saw Haruhi giving Hikaru a blowjob yesterday!" I blurt out.

Tamaki's face suddenly falls.

"Wha-what?" he asks, his voice in a panicked state.

At that moment, I realize that Hikaru and Haruhi's relationship is as bad for Tamaki as it is for me.

I didn't even realize how much he is in love with her.

How can he be taking care of me when he is going through the exact same thing? He's noticed everything wrong with me, and I hadn't even known something was wrong with him.

I never really realized how nice of a guy Tamaki truly is.

"Yeah." I say simply, feeling bad for telling him so bluntly now.

Tamaki takes a shaky breath, "I'm sorry, Kao-"

I stop him with my lips.

I had leaned in mid-sentence and kissed him on the lips, taking him and myself by surprise.

Even though it is what I planned to do when I brought us in the closet, it is still shocking that I am kissing my friend.

A guy.

Tamaki.

I move my lips against his. He is frozen at first, but finally wraps his arms around me and pulls me in closer, kissing me back even more passionately than I am him.

He licks my lips and I part them. He sticks his tongue inside my mouth and begins to explore the new territory.

A moan escapes from somewhere in my throat and goes into his mouth.

We finally separate when we both need a breath of air.

"Why are you doing this, Kaoru?" he asks me breathlessly.

I say nothing and push him up against the wall.

I kiss the side of his neck, then the outline of his jaw, and then begin my way down his chest; pushing his uniform shirt up messily the further I go down.

I unbuckle Tamaki's pants and pull them down along with his boxers.

I marvel a bit at his manhood before I take it all in my mouth.

Tamaki bucks his hips and moans.

I start to wonder if this is how Hikaru had acted when Haruhi had begun on him.

I wonder how they had even got started in the first place. Who had taking the first step? Did Hikaru moan Haruhi's name like Tamaki was doing to me right now?

And with those thoughts in my head, I begin to cry.

Not loudly, just silently as I continue with Tamaki while he moans in pleasure.

No matter how much I love hearing Tamaki moan because of _me_, it means close to nothing considering I would rather it be Hikaru.

My tears run down my cheeks and I close my eyes until the whole thing is over.

When it is over, Tamaki slides down the wall to the ground. He rests his head on the wall and tries desperately to catch his breath.

I scoot over and sit next to him.

I let my head fall on his shoulder and just sit there, trying and failing to contain my tears.

After a few moments of silence, Tamaki puts his hand on my head and begins stroking my hair.

"Kaoru?" he begins, "Are you in _love_ with Hikaru?" he asks timidly.

My tears immediately stop.

It all begins to make sense now.

Why am I so mad about Hikaru dating Haruhi? Jealousy. Why am I not eating? To get Hikaru's attention. Why was I so sad and angry when I saw Haruhi giving him that blowjob? Why did I drag Tamaki in this room and give _him_ a blowjob? Why did I start crying when I started thinking about Hikaru?

I always thought it was because I loved my brother and just missed him.

But I was wrong. It's not because I _love_ him; it's because I'm _in love_ with him!

"Yes." I answer finally.

There is silence once again. Tamaki continues to stroke my hair.

He understands.

How?

"We should probably get back to the club." Tamaki announces softly.

I nod and take my head off of his shoulder, then push myself up.

I stick out a hand and help pull Tamaki up.

Before he takes my hand, he pulls up his boxers and pants.

I open the door when we are both standing and we make our way out.

We stand far enough away from each other that there is a small gap in-between us.

After a little while, I feel a hand grab mine and look down to see Tamaki's hand intertwined with mine.

I look in his eyes and smile. He smiles back and pulls me in, the gap disappearing.

I can't explain how grateful I am for him.

I realize now that we both need each other.

Both of us can not have the person we are in love with. We are each other's moral support.

And though there is something there for Tamaki; something I can't deny that I feel, I know that he will never be my Hikaru.

And I feel that he thinks the same thing.

Without any words, we have made a mutual agreement.

We will always be there for each other; we will always feel something for the other, but we will never be able to replace the other's true love.

We open the doors to Music Room #3 together.

Likewise, we walk in together, hands still intertwined, hair in a mess, and sweating.

All eyes turn to look at us.

Silence.

Then, "EEEEEPPPPP! Look at Kaoru and Tamaki! Aren't they so adorable together? Why are you two so sweaty? What were you doing? EEEEEEPPPP, I'm going to faint!"

As soon as one of our customers screams, the room erupts in squeals and our customers faint to the ground and wiggle around.

Hikaru stares at the pair of us, his face in shock.

Kyouya walks up to us, seeming unfazed by all that's going on, "Kaouru," he says to me, "You and Hikaru need to get on with your act; you read the scrip I presume." He states, pushing his glasses up.

I nod my head and release Tamaki's hand.

I slowly walk to the couch that my twin is sitting at and take a seat next to him.

To any untrained eye, it would seem as if my brother and I are sitting right next to each other; but I know differently.

There is the tiniest of gaps separating the two of us. This is a gap that had never been there before. I know it and I'm guessing Hikaru does, too. In fact, it may have even been him who made sure the gap is there.

Definitely not mine.

Because despite my anger at him, I still want to be as close to him as I can. I want our legs to be touching and our bodies to be in perfect symmetry; the way it should be.

But I went and ruined any possibility of that by telling Hikaru I hated him.

Of course it isn't his fault. He was only getting a blowjob from his _girlfriend._ How it is supposed to be, right?

Of course it is his fault that he is dating her and that he hasn't been paying attention to me.

I wonder how I can contradict myself so much…

"Hikaru, Kaoru, you seem upset with each other, is everything okay?" one of our customers asks.

Time to get in the act.

I pout my lip and look down, "No it's not, ladies." I begin. The girls gasp and lean in closer. "You see, last night I said something horrible to Hikaru, and I'm afraid he hasn't forgiven me." I say to them.

Why is it so easy for me to say this in an act?

Why can't I just talk to him about it one-on-one? Am I really so pathetic that I can only display my emotions to my brother while we are giving a play to our fans? How will he know it is real if the act we are doing is only meant to be fake?

I am truly one pitiful human being.

"Oh, Hikaru! Why won't you forgive you're brother? He's obviously sorry!" One of the girls screeches while the others nod their heads in agreement.

Hikaru turns to them, "Kaoru just doesn't realize that he doesn't need anyone but me." He says and grabs my arm roughly.

No one but me notices; I don't even think he notices how harsh he is being.

I look to the side and see Kyouya staring at us with a disapproving look. He knows we have completely abandoned the script he made us.

We are bringing our personal problems into this little charade.

"I believe that Hikaru doesn't realize how much I _do_ need him!" I fight back.

I notice that neither of us is really talking to _each other_. We are talking to our fans instead.

"What Kaoru doesn't know is that he's being completely _irrational_ and he isn't even acting _himself_ anymore! He's become some complete stranger!" Hikaru yells.

The girls jump a little and a crowd begins to form around us, included in it Tamaki and Kyouya.

This stuns me. He's noticed I'm acting strange and hasn't done anything about it; hasn't talked to me and asked what's wrong?

Wouldn't the old, single Hikaru have done this?

"I think Hikaru is acting like the stranger." I mumble timidly.

Hikaru gives a squeeze to my arm and I wince.

"_Kaoru,"_ Hikaru says my name with complete and total loathing "has become someone I don't even know anymore! How can I call him my brother? My _twin?_ What the hell is wrong with you, Kaoru?!" Hikaru yells at me, finally directing his words at me and not the girls, his voice shaking with emotion.

I'm doing it again.

I'm in that numb state like I was the day I found out Hikaru and Haruhi were dating.

"Hikaru, that's quite enough." Kyouya says.

Hikaru releases my arms and jumps up from the seat.

He pushes through the crowd of people and runs right out the door.

Haruhi comes straight up to me. I barely notice her.

"I'm so sorry, Kaoru. He doesn't mean it, really; he's just upset. I'll go talk to him." She says to me before running out after my brother.

Tamaki runs up to me and gets down on one knee. He puts a hand on my knee, "Kaoru?" he asks.

I look down at him.

His mouth is moving but there are no words coming out. Is he doing that on purpose or it is me who's not hearing anything?

But I don't really care.

Hikaru can't call me his brother anymore? He doesn't even recognize me as his twin?

What have I done?

What the _hell _have_ I _done?!

Tamaki's eyebrows furrow and his eyes widen. He mouths one word over and over again, but I give no reaction.

He stands up and takes a hold of my shoulders. He shakes me vigorously over and over again.

I don't move. As I said before: numb.

Kyouya, Mori, and Honey rush up behind him.

Honey is crying and Mori is pushing worried looking girls away. Kyouya pulls out his cell phone.

I glance up for a moment and lock eyes with Tamaki.

I can't hear him, but by the look on his face, the tears in his eyes, and the movement of his mouth, I can tell he is shouting.

He's getting blurry now. So are all the people around him.

My head is spinning and pounding and I can't concentrate.

Where's Hikaru at? I want him back so bad.

I _am_ his twin. I _am_ his brother.

"Hikaru." I whisper.

And that's the last thing I remember before I slip into a black unconsciousness.

I'm not complaining, though. I'm grateful to be able to forget, even for a while.

* * *

**To be continued.**

**Okay...even I'm like "YOU FUCKIN TARD HIKARU!" and I wrote this...So I'm guessing you guys are just as mad at him, right? Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter and if you did, please tell me what you think :) You're guys's reviews mean the world to me! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi everyone! :D Wow, thanks for the reviews. Sorry it took so long...I kinda got my first bad review and it made me a little...down in the dumps...then I had a little brain fart but then WOO I had a brain storm! I just want to say that I've almost reached my goal of 100 reviews! Thank you guys SOOO much! **

**Anyways, to the chapter! I think you all might be a little bit happier with Hikaru in this one! I know he seemed unforgivable last chapter, but let's see what happens :D Just saying, I personally love the review of smashing Hikaru's dick so Haruhi couldn't suck it...thanks for making me chuckle! **

**Well, enjoy!**

* * *

The first thing I see when I open my eyes is Haruhi.

"Kaoru! You're awake, thank God." She says from the chair she is sitting in next to my bed.

My bed?

No, it's not my bed. It's _a_ bed, but too small to be mine.

"Where am I?" I ask her as I put a hand on the back of my head.

My head hurts so much. It has that pounding it does every time after I…faint. Is that what happened?

"You're in a hospital, Kaoru." She says to me matter-of-factly.

"Why?" I ask. Though I already know the answer. It's because I fainted.

It has to be.

It all comes rushing back now. Sitting on the couch; Hikaru and I yelling at our fans the words we long to say to each other; Hikaru yelling that he no longer sees me as his brother; as his twin.

I remember Tamaki kneeling down beside me, though I don't recall what he said to me. Had he said anything at all?

The last thing I can recall is looking into those blue orbs of his and then…darkness.

"You fainted at the host club. It's been an hour since we brought you here." She tells me.

We?

I look around the room. No one is in it but Haruhi and me.

"Where are the others?" I ask, "Hikaru; Tamaki, where are they?" I ask more forcefully, trying to push myself up.

As I do, there is a pang in my right arm.

"Ow!" I let out and look down at my arm.

What the hell?

Most of my arm, up to my forearm, is covered in a plain white cast. How had I not noticed that when I woke up? And why do I even have it on?

I look over to Haruhi and am about to ask her when she sticks a hand up to silence me.

"When you fainted, you went to the side and fell off the couch. You were in an awkward position so when you slipped, you landed on your right arm." She answers me, as if she was reading my mind. It really is freaky sometimes. "Tamaki tried to catch you but…well he just didn't get you in time."

My arm is…broken?

I can't believe this! Of all my fainting spells, I break my arm when I fall off of a _couch?_ And right after Hikaru yelled at me and practically disowned me?

God really must hate me.

But wait. Haruhi never answered my question: Where _is_ everyone?!

"Haruhi, you never answered me." I say to her.

Her face shows a little surprise; most likely because of my apparent lack of concern for my broken arm.

The expression quickly disappears and she sighs.

"I wanted to talk to you one-on-one, Kaoru. I asked the others to leave for ten minutes while I waited to see if you woke up. This is the only way I can talk to you alone." She tells me.

I lock eyes with her. What could she possibly want to talk about?

She meets my stare and continues, "Over half of those minutes are gone, so I need to hurry. Kaoru…I wanted to tell you something…something really important." Her words come out fast and sloppy.

"Well what is it?" I ask her, getting a little annoyed at her for stalling so much. And for making it so that she was the first thing I saw when I woke up.

That's _exactly_ what I want to see after an hour of seeing nothing but darkness.

She opens her mouth to tell me something when the door to my room swings open.

"Kao-chan!" Honey screams and he races up to me.

He throws Usa-chan to the side and jumps up on my bed, hitting my crippled arm as he does so.

"OUCH!" I wail.

"Careful, Honey-sempai, Kaoru's very fragile right now and we have to be careful with him; no matter how happy we are that he's awake." A voice says calmly.

I look up and see the owner of the voice.

Tamaki.

I want to smile, but my lips seem to be stuck in a permanent frown.

He seems to understand and nods, a sad smile playing across his lips.

At the sound of Honey's crying, I turn back to the small boy, "I'm sorry, Kao-chan! I was just so happy that you finally woke up!" he blubbers. Snot is beginning to form in his nose and his tears are free falling.

"Its okay, Honey." I tell him, trying to make him feel better.

Mori comes up from behind and grabs Honey from under the arms. He picks him up and puts the blonde on his shoulders.

Honey wraps his arms around his cousin and smiles, seeming quite happy again.

I look back up at Tamaki.

Kyouya is standing right beside him, but where is my brother?

Everyone is in here but him.

Would he really not come to see how I am? Would he carry his grudge this far?

Suddenly, Tamaki is pushed to the side.

Hikaru walks in with Dr. Hiromi close behind.

Hikaru looks at me and his eyes become wide.

I want to say something to him and I know he wants to say something to me, but both of us are beat by Dr. Hiromi.

"Hello, Kaoru, nice to see you again." She says to me brightly.

"I could argue with that." I mutter to myself.

She doesn't hear me and goes on, "Looks like you had a little accident, huh? I thought we already discussed that you need to get your proteins so you don't have these little fainting spells of yours."

Dr. Hiromi walks up to the side of my bed and looks at something on the clipboard she is holding.

"Hmmm." She thinks, "Looks like you hurt your arm pretty bad; it'll probably be about-" she counts out on her fingers, "-six weeks before your arm is fully healed."

My face falls, "Six weeks?" I repeat.

That's so long! What will I do until then? Wither away in my room?

Well…I guess I was kind of doing that already…

"Yes." She nods, "But don't worry, you'll be in good hands. I've talked to everyone in this room about taking care of you and what they will have to do. They decided among themselves who will be your main caregiver."

I look over to my group of friends and my lone family member.

My eyes expectantly go to Tamaki, who would be my first guess at who volunteered to take the most care of me.

He looks down and shakes his head.

He then lifts his head and nods it in the direction of my twin.

The whole time, Tamaki has a very disapproving look on his face, like he doesn't trust my brother to look after me.

"Hikaru?" I ask in a hushed voiced, my eyes changing direction so that I am now looking to my twin.

He looks at the floor and clenches his hands together. Before he can say anything, Dr. Hiromi-yet again-speaks.

"Your brother will be helping you with everyday things. Along with that, he will be making sure that you get all your daily proteins. Don't try anything with him, because he will be with you every minute of every day." She smirks, "It would be unwise to not eat."

The woman crosses her arms and continues, "Now Hikaru won't be your soul caretaker. All of your friends have agreed to help you out in any way they can once you return to school. Which should be soon. Though you may not think it, you _can_ go to school with a broken arm." She chuckles.

I sigh.

I don't know what to feel right now.

I should be happy that Hikaru and I will be together twenty-four seven. We are practically being _forced_ to interact with each other!

And with that, how will he have time for Haruhi?

I will finally be getting my wish of having my brother back!

On the other hand, we are starting off on bad terms.

Hikaru is under the impression I hate him while I am quite sure that he doesn't even see me as anything but a memory.

How could this possibly turn out well?

I for one don't have the guts to talk to my brother; to tell him how I really feel. Especially now that I have realized that what I'm feeling for him isn't just brotherly love, but true love.

And I also know that he is much too stubborn to take his words back.

So there is no way this is going to end well.

Right?

"When will he be able to leave the hospital?" Tamaki chips in.

Dr. Hiromi turns her attention to him, "He should be able to leave tomorrow morning. I just want to have him spend the night to make sure he is stable, but that's only me being _extremely_ cautious. He should be fine." She tells him.

Tamaki sighs with relief and smiles. He must have had a lot of tension when he came in because the difference in him now is quite obvious.

"Which reminds me, you all need to get out of here!" Dr. Hiromi says suddenly, clapping her hands together. "Kaoru here needs his rest and he can't do that with all of you lot in here. So shoo, go on, say good-bye and get out!" she says sternly, beginning to shoo everyone to the door with her hands.

Everyone waves to me and says their good-byes until I am finally alone, Dr. Hiromi leaving with them and closing the door behind her.

Now I am left alone to my thoughts.

So Hikaru and I will have to spend every waking minute together for six weeks straight?

It's funny that I use the words "have to". A few weeks ago, it would be like any regular day for the two of us to be together every second of the day.

I can't help but wonder what tomorrow will bring.

XX

Dr. Hiromi pushes me out of the hospital in a wheelchair.

As soon as my eyes adjust to the bright sunlight, I see a black stretch limo and Hikaru.

He gives a lazy wave to Dr. Hiromi and runs up to the two of us.

I avert my eyes from him and look down at the concrete ground. I can't look him in the eyes. If I do, he will see the fear in them; the fear of having to spend six weeks with someone who says he can't even call me his brother.

Or will he?

"Hikaru, nice to see you." Dr. Hiromi greets my brother in a friendly matter.

Hikaru doesn't say anything and, taking me by surprise, extends his hand.

I look up from the ground and stare at his hand. It is just hanging there; waiting for me to grasp it.

I reluctantly stick my good hand out and intertwine my fingers with my brother's.

They fit as perfectly as I remember.

Hikaru tightens his grip and pulls me up.

My feet hit the ground and I feel a bit wobbly. Hikaru notices this and pulls me in closer.

He puts his free arm around me and holds me close, mimicking how Tamaki held me on our way back from the park.

Neither of us says a word to each other as he guides me to the limo.

Dr. Hiromi hurries behind us and quickly opens the back door to the limo. Hikaru helps me inside before turning to my doctor.

"I assume one of the nurses gave you the list of things you will need to do for your brother?" she asks my twin.

"Yeah, I got it." He nods his head solemnly.

Dr. Hiromi straightens up, "Well, just to make sure, you're going to need to help him into his clothes, feed him-make _sure_ he eats!-bathe him, help him get settled in bed." She thinks. "Which reminds me, you are going to have to sleep in the same bed as him. I didn't tell you this yesterday but-" the woman lowers her voice, trying to make it so that I don't hear. I do anyways, though. "-your brother has shown many signs of depression. We are afraid that if he is left alone at any time, he may do something…irrational. It would be best that you stay with him all hours of the day. If you need some time to yourself, it is understandable. We have talked to your friends and they have agreed to take shifts with your brother on some days of the week, if that's alright with you."

Hikaru nods his head and the doctor continues.

"Good. We have also given them the same list that you received. All you have to do whenever you need your alone time is to drop him off at one of your friends' houses. Simple as that. Though I strongly suggest that you don't take _too_ many of these little breaks. Your brother is obviously going through something and it's up to you to find out what that thing is. Something has occurred to make your brother act out in this way. If we don't do something about it, I'm afraid things will just get worse."

I see Dr. Hiromi try to subtly hand Hikaru something.

She says, in an even quieter tone than before, "These are antidepressants. Just give one to your brother every morning during breakfast. Tell him they are for pain if you must; just make sure he takes them."

Hikaru looks at the object in his hand for quite a long time. He rolls the bottle in his hand.

"Do you understand everything I have just told you?" Dr. Hiromi whispers.

After a few moments, Hikaru nods his head and says in a strained voice, "Yes, I understand."

"Good!" Dr. Hiromi's voice returns to normal level and is quite cheery.

She looks past my brother and to me, "You feel better, Kaoru! I hope I won't be seeing you here soon!" she waves goodbye and Hikaru turns around, and then slams the door.

He walks to the other side of the limo and slides in next to me.

As the limo drives away, Dr. Hiromi waves until she is well out of sight.

I feel eyes on my back and turn from the window to find Hikaru intensely staring at me.

I start to tap my foot nervously and begin picking invisible lint off of my cast.

"Kaoru…" he says suddenly.

I don't reply and turn away.

I look out the window and watch the passing scenery.

I almost wish it were Tamaki I was in the car with. With him, I could snuggle up close and talk about everything I want to say to Hikaru.

It's quite ironic, really.

I have been wishing for my brother to turn his attention towards me for weeks. Now, the opportunity for him to do just that has practically fallen in my lap, and I am wishing for someone else.

I guess I am like my brother in the sense that we are both very complicated.

After a few minutes, the limo pulls into the Hitachiin Mansion.

Hikaru gets out first, then comes around to my side and helps me out.

He helps me up the stairs to my room and I allow him to, only because I know I would not be able to climb them alone.

We reach my room and he brings me to my bed, where I plop down.

He stands silently in front of me, studying me almost.

I try to lock eyes with him, but I find it impossible.

Instead, I look around my room, finding interest in every small thing.

Finally, my brother breaks the awkward silence.

"Kaoru," he starts. I believe he is about to apologize. If he does, I will forgive him and this whole situation will take a violent turn for the better. "You stink." He whispers.

Well that was certainly odd, but I suppose I put too much hope in him.

He will defiantly not be the one to take the first step in re-building our broken relationship.

I look at him in pure shock, "Uhhhh." Is my only response.

What words could I possibly say to him? Will I ever be able to speak to him again without my heart breaking?

"I'll start a bath for you. Please just stay right here." He tells me sadly.

Is he afraid I'll go and do something stupid?

My brother walks to the bathroom that is in my room. I soon here the sound of water running and he returns.

"Do you have any plastic bags in here?" he asks, but he is already walking to the spot next to my trashcan where I keep a bundle of plastic bags.

He grabs one and walks up to me.

He kneels down and grabs the exposed part of my broken arm.

I shudder at his touch. He is so warm and I feel so cold.

He tenderly lifts the part of my arm that is covered with the cast and slips the bag on.

He ties it, and then looks up at me.

For a moment, our eyes lock and we remain in silence.

His hand is holding my arm so lovingly and so softly. I almost want to say something. I almost want to tell him I'm sorry.

But then the image of him shouting at me clouds my mind and I turn away.

He sighs sadly and stands up, "You can't get you're cast wet so every time you take a bath, we'll have to cover it with a plastic bag." He informs me.

I look to the side and nod my head.

Once again, he sighs.

Hikaru walks towards the bundle of plastic bags once again and grabs another one.

He disappears into the bathroom. He's in there for a few moments before I hear the running of water stop.

Only a few seconds later, he is by me again.

He helps me stand up and I let him. We walk to the bathroom together.

I see that there is a chair by the side of the tub and wonder if Hikaru was in here last night; making certain arrangements that went along with the list he was given.

"Sit down, Kaoru." Hikaru orders me, letting go of me.

I take a seat in the chair.

Hikaru bends down and begins untying my shoes. He removes them both and throws them to the side, along with my socks.

I take a look around the bathroom and notice that there are no razers anywhere to be seen.

I remember the plastic bag he brought in only a few moments again.

Had he thrown away all the razers? Why would he do something like that? That doesn't make any s-

Wait, does he think I'm going to hurt myself with them?

How could he possibly think that?!

He's taking this depression thing way too seriously.

I would never hurt myself!

I've only ever thought about it…

"Lift your arms." Hikaru tells me, bringing me out of my thoughts.

I look up at him with wide eyes.

Wait…he has to undress me?

Hikaru rolls his eyes and gives me a weak smile, "Don't be shy, Kaoru; it's not like I haven't seen you shirtless before." He announces before lifting up my arms for me.

I don't fight, I only whine my protests.

He begins to lift my shirt. It becomes a little difficult on my right arm due to the cast and bag, but my shirt is eventually thrown to the side along with my shoes and socks.

"Oh, Kaoru." Hikaru whispers as he sees my weak body.

I close my eyes. Has he really not seen my body since he started dating Haruhi?

"I'm going to take your pants off now." He lets me know before bending down and pulling off the sweatpants I am wearing.

I feel incredibly vulnerable sitting there with nothing on but my boxers.

And I know that feeling will increase tenfold in a few moments when I am stripped of those as well.

Hikaru puts his fingers under the waistband of my boxers, looks me in the eyes, and pulls them down to the ground.

Naked.

It's not really _that_ that bothers me.

It's the look on his face as he gets an eyeful of my pathetic body.

Now that he's finally noticed my horrible condition, I feel ashamed.

"Okay, in you go." Hikaru says, forcing his eyes away from my body.

He helps me up.

I step into the water and am pleased to find it a perfect warm temperature.

I sit down and slip lower into the huge tub until my whole body is completely submerged in the water.

Hikaru sits down in the chair and grabs a cup that sits on the floor.

He fills it with some of the tub water and pours it on my head after warning me to close my eyes.

The water drips down my face.

It feels surprisingly nice and I begin to feel more comfortable.

My tense shoulders begin to relax and I sigh.

From above, Hikaru chuckles, "Oh, Kaoru." He says simply before pouring another cupful of water onto my head.

Next, he takes a bottle of shampoo and squirts some of it into his hands.

He rubs his hands together, and then begins scrubbing the shampoo into my hair.

Despite my feelings at the moment, his touch sends tingles throughout my whole body.

He notices how I shudder and chuckles once more, "So sensitive, Kaoru." He says, more to himself than anything.

After getting the shampoo out of my hair, he puts in conditioner.

And finally after that, he brings out the body wash.

"Turn around, baby brother." He tells me.

I oblige with no hesitation.

I am becoming addicted to him washing me, no matter how much I don't want to.

He scrubs my back gently with a washcloth.

After my back come my arms, then my feet, and then finally my legs.

As he washes my thighs, I have to bite my lip to hold back the moan that is building in the back of my throat.

Why can't I just ignore the feelings him washing me is giving me?

Why must those tingles travel straight to my groin?

I begin to fumble awkwardly, trying desperately to push away from Hikaru.

He notices this and smiles, "Don't worry, Kaoru. I won't think any less of you just because I'm washing your more sensitive areas and it has an effect on you." He tells me knowingly.

Despite myself, my face turns a bright red.

I look down at the water and allow him to finish up.

When it's all done, he stands up and helps me out of the tub, handing me a towel as soon as I'm up.

I quickly wrap it around myself and dry off as best I can, though my arms feel weak.

Once I am all dry, Hiakru helps me into new clothing, making sure I am layered enough to keep me warm considering how cold I feel.

He helps me into my bed and tucks me in, and then jumps in on the other side.

I keep my back turned towards him, not wanting him to see me.

Suddenly, a chill goes through my body and I shudder.

As soon as I do, I feel a body press up against me and an arm is thrown around me, pulling me in close.

My heartbeat quickens.

I almost say something, but Hikaru speaks first, "I'm here, Kaoru, don't worry."

I close my eyes tight and bury my head into my pillow.

Why is he doing this?

Why is he being so nice?

How can he so easily forget those words he said to me?

Will he ever bring them up?

Will he ever apologize?

And why is it that my feelings are so messed up right now, that I don't know whether I should be happy about this, or even more depressed.

* * *

**To be continued.**

**Sooo...do you feel a little better about Hikaru now? Must he still redeem himself? And him and Kaoru are _forced_ to spend time together? Oh my...**

**Well, tell me what you thought :D And I may seem a little loopy considering how late it is... thanks for reading!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Oh goodness you guys, I can't apologize enough! It's been soooo long since I've updated and I feel absolutely horrible. I wish I could tell you all that's been going on. Let's just say I have been incredibly depressed for several months and couldn't bring myself to do what I love. But I did it! I finished the next chapter that I've been working on forever! **

**A quick recap: Last chapter, Kaoru broke his arm and now Hikaru is taking care of him, showing his affection in the bathtub where he cleaned his crippled brother. Is he trying to redeem himself? Making up for his mistakes and mistreatment of his poor twin? But could he make up for saying that he doesn't even know who Kaoru is anymore? **

**Please, enjoy! I think it's pretty decent! *Warning* One will experience many a feels. **

* * *

When I wake up, the first thing I realize is that I am in my bed alone.

Before I can even question to where Hikaru went, his voice breaks through the silence.

"Good-morning, Kaoru!" he says cheerfully from a chair that is seated next to my bed.

I look at him with wide eyes, my voice box still seeming to be broken whenever I am in his presence.

I eye him carefully and see that there is a tray sitting on his lap. On the tray is a tall cup of orange juice, scrambled eggs, two pieces of toast, and three sausage links.

I also notice that there is a rather large sized pill.

I look back up into his eyes and he smiles.

"I know it's not much, but I made it myself. I figured that the cooks couldn't make you food with love in it like I can." He tells me.

Love?

Despite myself, my heartbeat quickens.

He hasn't said he loves me in ages. I can't even remember the last time he said it to me! He's trying so hard…

When I don't say anything, he stands up.

"Sit up, Kaoru. I'm going to set this in your lap so you can eat it." He explains to me.

I gently push myself up. He picks up a pillow and rests it behind my head so that I am comfortable, and then sets the tray on my lap.

After this, he moves to the end of my bed and crawls on.

He sits Indian style and watches me; waiting for me to eat something.

With my good hand, I pick up the fork that lies on the tray and stare down at the food.

It all looks repulsive and I really don't want to eat any of it. Even now that Hikaru has noticed how sickly I am. I guess I've just sort of become accustomed to not eating.

I look up to Hikaru and am going to tell him that I don't want to eat, but when I open my mouth, all that comes out is a pathetic little squeak.

It seems to be enough for him, though.

"I know you don't want to eat, Kaoru, but you have to. If you don't, you're never going to get better." He thinks for a moment before adding, "You don't have to eat it all; just a few bites would be okay. We'll start out slow." He smiles reassuringly.

I notice he hasn't said anything about the pill yet.

I sigh and look down at the food once more.

I close my eyes and plunge the fork into the scrambled eggs.

I bring the fork up to my mouth and weakly separate my lips. Then I stuff the food into my mouth and chew slowly.

It doesn't taste too horrible, but it doesn't taste good, either.

I guess that's because I haven't eaten food in so long, though. I'm sure I would have thought it delicious a while ago.

After swallowing, I open my eyes. I see that Hikaru is beaming; absolutely ecstatic.

I set down the fork and pick up a piece of toast. I nibble on the sides until a good about is gone. After this, I set it down and eat one piece of the sausage.

Finally, I take a sip of orange juice and pick up the pill.

I eye it, lift an eyebrow, and look at Hikaru.

I know what it is, but I'm wondering what Hikaru will tell me it is. Will he lie to me like Dr. Hiromi told him he should?

I really hope he doesn't. It would be a lot easier if he just told me the truth.

Hikaru frowns and looks down at the bed. He plays with the covers.

"I'm supposed to tell you that that pill your holding is for pain. But I'm not going to lie to you, Kaoru. It's for depression."

He looks back up at me and I see that all the color in his face has drained.

"Dr. Hiromi told me that you're showing signs of depression. She says these pills will help you get better. I shouldn't be telling you this, but I guess I thought there'd be a better chance of you taking it if I told you the truth." He says quietly.

I'm shocked.

I truly had not expected this from my twin.

But since he told me the truth; since he took a chance and told me the real reason for this pill, I'm going to take it.

I place the pill on my tongue and pick up the glass of orange juice.

I take a sip and it goes down my throat, along with the pill.

I set the glass of juice down and slightly push the tray with my left hand.

Hikaru realizes what I'm trying to say and nods his head.

"Alright, Kaoru, if that's all you want to eat right now, that's fine with me. I'm happy that you even had any of it." He chuckles, "If our places were switched, you'd probably have a lot more trouble getting me to eat. I guess I'm a bit stubborn."

I get the feeling that Hikaru is talking to himself and not really me. He's been doing a lot of that lately.

I wonder why.

He gets up from the bed and comes around to take my tray. He puts it on my side table and calls for a maid, who takes it away.

For a few moments, he shuffles his feet awkwardly and I stare down at my covers.

Then, finally, he speaks, "Tono's coming over later. He called earlier and he seemed really worried about you. I get the feeling he doesn't trust me to look after you. I guess I can see why he thinks that." He sighs then continues, "Anyways, he should be here in about an hour; I figured we could do something until then. Watch a movie maybe?" he asks.

Wait a moment.

Hikaru is actually letting Tamaki come over even though he doesn't approve of the two of us?

And even more, he wants to do something with me? The two of us together? No Haruhi?

I eagerly nod my head and he smiles.

"Great! I have a few picked out, you can take your choice."

He lays out five of my favorite movies on the bed and I settle on a classic: The Lion King.

Neither of us say anything through the amount of movie we actually get done.

But Hikaru _does_ huddle up to me, making me tense up at our closeness.

Either he doesn't notice how tense I am, or he just spares me the embarrassment of saying anything.

After about an hour of the movie, there is a knock on the room's door.

Hikaru pauses the Lion King and jumps up.

"Hello, Tono, please come in." Hikaru greets our guest.

My face brightens up when I see Tamaki, and his does as well.

He runs up to me and gives me a hug.

He pulls away and runs his fingers through my hair, "Oh, Kaoru, how are you, mon amour? I didn't get any sleep last night! I was so worried about you. I would have come over, but I figured you would be asleep by the time I had arrived."

I laugh lightly, "Don't worry, Tamaki, I'm fine. It's just nice to see your face again." I say quietly to him.

Tamaki beams, "Likewise, Kaoru, likewise."

His face suddenly becomes serious.

He turns to my brother, who is standing by the door, watching us with his arms crossed. I get the feeling he is a little upset that I actually talked to Tamaki, yet I still haven't said a word to him.

"Is he treating you well? I can take you home with me, if you'd like." He whispers to me, eyes still fixed on my twin.

I shake my head, "Hikaru is being fine." I tell him, matching his voice level.

Tamaki turns back to me, "I volunteered to take you home so I could be your soul caretaker. I would have, too, but then your brother volunteered. Since he's your family, he won over me." Tamaki tells me, a sad hitch to his voice.

I place my good hand on his shoulder, "Don't worry, Tamaki. Hikaru is treating me fine and I will be able to stay at your house soon enough." I assure him.

Hikaru is going to need his alone time sometime and Tamaki is second in line to take care of me.

Tamaki nods his head, "Alright, but just call me if you need anything. I won't hesitate." He tells me. He is obviously very protective of me.

I smile at him, "That sounds good."

Tamaki leans over and places a kiss on my forehead. I close my eyes and sigh blissfully.

Hikaru coughs awkwardly and Tamaki and I separate.

Tamaki walks up to my brother, "If you hurt him in any way, you'll be hearing from me. I will take him away in a heartbeat." He warns my brother sternly.

I expect Hikaru to fight back. To tell my protector that he would never hurt me.

But Hikaru only looks at the ground and nods slowly.

This seems to please Tamaki and he turns back to me, "I have to go now, Kaoru, but I'll see you soon. Come back to school as soon as you can; we'll all be waiting." He says in a more merry tone.

With that, he shoulders past Hikaru and leaves my room, closing the door lightly behind him.

I look over at Hikaru and see a sad expression on his face.

He walks over to me, "Would you like to finish the movie?" he asks me.

I shake my head and scoot back into the bed I am sitting in.

When I reach my pillow, I lie down and attempt to pull the covers over me.

But I'm unsuccessful due to this stupid cast I have on.

I throw down the covers and let out an aggregated groan.

Hikaru hurries to my rescue and pulls the covers over me.

He leans over and places a kiss on my forehead, then crawls into the empty spot next to me.

I close my eyes.

I feel so weak and tired all the time. The food I ate is churning violently in my stomach and I know that my body is fighting to keep it down.

I groan lightly at the sickness I feel in my stomach.

Immediately I feel arms gently wrap around me and hesitantly pull me closer into a warm, familiar body.

"It will all be okay; everything will be okay and go back to normal." Hikaru whispers.

Again, I'm not exactly sure if he's saying this to me, or himself.

XX

Hikaru shuffles his feet awkwardly and knocks on the door in front of him.

He turns to me and ruffles his hair, "I don't feel comfortable doing this, Kaoru." He tells me with a hitch to his voice.

I turn to him and widen my eyes, shrugging my shoulders in a, "oh well" kind of way.

He sighs and nods his head, understanding what I mean.

I suppose these days we've had together have begun to affect him and allow him to start reading me again.

Then again, with no separation at all for the whole while I've had my cast on is sure to build up some kind of broken connection.

It's a few days after Tamaki came to visit me, and I'm currently standing at said person's door.

I'd woken up to Hikaru sitting cross-legged at the edge of my, recently _our, _bed, staring into his lap whilst twiddling his fingers, a deep look of thought on his face as his eyebrows creased.

I'd seen that look before. He had it whenever he had decided upon a tough decision, and was going to act upon it, no matter how frightened he was to do so.

I moved slightly, and the sound of my cast must have snapped my twin out of his trance because his head snapped up and he said, "Kaoru!"

After that, he began a long rant, with no breaths in-between his words, about how he had come upon a decision and he had to go out for a few hours. He told me he had to drop me off at one of my back up care-takers house.

To his disappointment, he had added "and Tono is first on the list."

And with that, we were taken to the Suhos' estate, where we currently were waiting for the door to be opened.

I look straight at the door, ignoring the worried side glances Hikaru keeps taking at me.

Finally, when I think I would no longer be able to take the awkwardness of the situation, the door opens and Tamaki spreads out his arms to embrace me.

"Ah finally! I can take care of my favorite son!" he says, snorting slightly after the word son.

No surprise.

A son and his father don't really have impulsive sexual tendencies in closets.

Tamaki lets go of me and looks to Hikaru, who is staring at him sternly, is stare never wavering.

"You take care of him, Tono, I don't want anything happening to him." My brother tells my care taker haughtily.

Tono scowls and pust his hands on his hips, "I could say the same to you. I'm not the one to worry about."

I cough into my hand, not ready for the two to get in a fight.

Hikaru turns around at this, ready to head towards the limo we had come in.

"I'll be back for you in a few hours, Kaoru. Call me if anything happens."

And with that, Hikaru struts off and Tamaki closes the door.

He sighs and gets his composure back as he turns to me.

He smiles brightly and grabs my good hand gently, yet sternly.

"Come on, Kaoru, we can go to my room!" he tells me excitedly as he starts pulling me, at a completely safe speed, up the stairs and to his room.

We enter his room and he lets go of my hand. He walks over to his bed and plops down on it, patting at a spot next to him in a gesture for me to come.

With no hesitation, I walk over to the bed and sit down next to him, our legs touching as I rest my head on his shoulder.

Everything feels so peaceful with him.

Tamaki wraps an arm around me.

He kisses my forehead gently, then moves his hand up to my chin and cups it, turning my face up towards him.

He brushes the hair out of my eyes and leans in to kiss me.

This kiss is better than the one in the closet.

It isn't fast and hard; it is soft and thought out.

My heartbeat quickens as the kiss gets slightly more passionate, Tamaki's tongue searching my mouth as if he can't quite discover every single inch.

When my breathing starts to get heavy, Tamaki slowly removes his tongue and departs my lips with a soft plopping noise.

I bite my lip as he looks into my eyes.

I sigh blissfully and curl up closer to him.

"Kaoru," he says sweetly, "I think there's something we need to talk about."

I nod, knowing exactly where he is heading with this.

My lover leans down and kisses my neck softly, his teeth gently gliding against it.

"After that day in the closet, before your accident." He announces into the nape of my neck before placing another kiss on it.

I crane my neck to offer him more skin.

"We said that we were nothing more than friends. We each loved someone else and we were just going to be there for each other." He kisses my neck once more. "When we discussed that, I was perfectly okay with it. I wanted nothing more than to just be there for you."

Tamaki moves away from my neck and looks me in the eye, tracing my jawline with his thumb gently.

"But when I saw you in that hospital bed, so alone and broken, I knew that I wanted more than just _being there_. I wanted..I still want to be with you. I want to be your protector."

He turns away, slightly embarrassed.

My eyes widen.

I had expected him to discuss that day in the closet, but I had no idea that he wanted to be with me.

Does he mean…a boyfriend?

Dating?

It was a shock, to say the least.

What happened to his undying love for Haruhi?

Tamaki takes a breath and continues, "I don't think it's healthy, Kaoru. This love you have for your brother."

I grit my teeth at this, to which he smiles gently and kisses my nose, showing that he meant not to insult me.

"I understand that you may love him, but the fact of the matter is…he doesn't love you in the same way."

Even now, my heart shatters.

My thoughts had been spoken aloud, and my denial could no longer protect me.

I look down, a tear running down my cheek, "I know." I agree quietly.

"But this…what you and I have is _real_. I thought…I was infatuated with Haruhi…but I've always had a deep longing to be with you. And seeing your pain…it breaks my heart, mon amour. I thought I could be happy with the attention you were suddenly giving me; I thought that maybe just the physical encounters would be enough. But I was wrong. I can't accept that."

He raises my currently lowered head up and searches my eyes, "To be truly happy, I need to be with you." He finishes.

What can I say?

Seriously, I have been left speechless.

I can't deny the truth in his words.

I do love my brother, but there is no way for me to ignore this affection I feel for Tamaki.

When I see him, my smile brightens and my heartbeat quickens.

I look forward to the days I will be able to be near him, because I know that he will make me feel better.

He doesn't make me question and hate myself like Hikaru does.

He makes me feel accepted.

I can trust him.

Maybe even more so than my own brother.

And he's right: it's _not_ healthy to be this madly in love with my own brother.

My twin.

Should I go for the one who had slowly but surely made me fall for him?

Sure, it was a little less from the ordinary, him being a boy, but it was definitely more normal than being in love with my male twin brother.

Everything he said was…reasonable.

Yet the question still remained:

Would I be with him?

"Kaoru?"

Tamaki's voice pulls me out of my thoughts.

I look to Tamaki. The expression of doubt on his face makes me realize I must have not responded for longer than I had assumed, leaving him with no answer.

I take a deep breath.

"Tamaki…I-I think it would be," I start.

It's time to forget about him.

It's time to move on.

He loves Haruhi and he will never love me like I love him.

That's just the sad truth of it all.

"-I would be honored to be with you." I finish.

And there it is.

The answer.

Tamaki beams at me and hugs me tightly, being careful around my broken arm.

"Oh Kaoru, this is so wonderful!" he exclaims.

I nuzzle my head into his neck and wrap my good arm around him.

I've done it.

I've taken the first step in moving on.

All it took was accepting that Hikaru loves Haruhi.

And it hurt.

It hurt so much.

But Tamaki made that hurt seem slightly less painful, and for that I was grateful.

For the rest of my time with Tamaki, we stay close together, his arm around me almost the whole time as we watch a movie.

Well, I say watch when in all actually we really just talked, learning more about each other, with a few breaks to explore each other's mouths.

After what seems like a few minutes, my phone buzzes and I see a text from Hikaru saying that he has arrived to pick me up.

Sadly, Tamaki and I depart.

He holds my hand as he walks me to the door.

"Please come back to school soon, Kaoru, I've been missing you there so much." He tells me as he opens the door for me.

"I'll make sure to be back soon." I assure him.

We hug once more before I walk outside, throwing a wave to Tamaki.

My boyfriend.

No longer "Tono".

No longer "lover".

But boyfriend, Tamaki Suho.

My smile stays wide as I enter the limo and slide in opposite of Hikaru.

"Hello Hikaru!" I say brightly.

These are the first words I've said to him in a while that aren't by force and I don't even realize that, strangely enough, he isn't even shocked.

My night with Tamaki has made me feel more alive than I have in the longest of times.

It feels like a weight as been lifted and nothing can bring me down now that I have Tamaki to protect me.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru says loudly, making me assume that he has been trying to get my attention.

I turn to face him, my face beaming, and the opposite of his solemn one.

He tells me something.

Something that makes my face fall.

Something that makes my high disappear.

With those few words that he has spoken, my world seems to come crashing down again.

Five words; that's all it takes to make someone question their decisions.

Five words.

"I broke up with Haruhi."

And it all comes crashing down.

* * *

**To be continued.**

**Whattttttt?! Tamaki and Kaoru are together? Everything was going great and now this?! Hikaru and Haruhi are _broken up?!_ What could possibly be the reasoning behind Hikaru breaking it off with his beloved girlfriend? ...Find out in the next chapter (;**

**I hope you enjoyed, please leave a review if you liked it, or are in complete and total shock! The feeeeellssss! (Also, check out my new poll for this story)**


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